I'm getting a bad-- a really bad-- a really, really bad feeling about the election. It's starting to have that feel of almost every election I've seen since I've been alive-- once again, a weaker Republican candidate is outmanuevering, outthinking, and outflanking the Democrat in almost every way shape or form and in the face of the attack, the Democrat seems passive at worst, utterly outclassed at best. Except in the case of this election, it's not through incompetence as much as it is as overconfidence. And, as usual, it's one of those situations where somebody not in the campaign but watching from the sidelines, like, say, me, could come up with at least five tv ads and five speeches that would do a better job defending the candidate's positions and destroying the opponent's positions better than what's being seen out there. I mean, at this point, Obama should just run an ad of McCain saying "I'm not an expert on economics" followed with clips of Phil Graham saying American's are whimps and just show it over and over and over and over again. Hell, he should just run an ad pointing out the fact that as per usual, the Republicans have absolutely no ideas about health care and don't even seem to care.

And, as usual, an election that should be bringing forth serious, substantive debates on huge, tremendous, important issues (like, say, the obviously apparent decline and fall of the American Empire) is being lost in the haze of tv ads, counter attacks, and the Unbearable Lameness of the Media. Let's look at foreign policy, for example. It's obvious McCain takes uses whatever mobility he has left in his arm, pops some viagra, and whacks off every night to the thought of fighting war upon war upon war. Yet there doesn't seem to be much in the way of concern over this. Somehow, the neo-con's haven't been totally killed off yet and it's mainly because it's much easier screaming "Russia is evil!!!!!!" on tv than saying "well, yes, but Georgia fucked up, we kind of baited Russia, and let's not get into too much of a tizzy about this." Sadly, it's hard to run on a foreign policy of "let's not lose our heads here" which is actually probably the most important component of running a foreign policy.

Which brings up the final bit. That, as usual, an American populace that tells pollster after pollster that they want certain things will completely vote against them because of various reasons. The fact that we are completely tired of war or that Russia and China is doing what they are because we're mired in too many wars would lend towards one thinking that maybe blowing shit up isn't necessarily the best policy, but darn, doesn't McCain look experienced when he's popping a vein and talking about how we're all Georgians? I'm not, btw. Sorry to say this, but fuck 'em.

And I'm not even going to get into economic matters. Suffice it to say, that if you complain about lack of work, lack of healthcare, lack of pretty much anything, and yet vote against somebody who supports all that because of, say, an insufficient love of fetuses, you kinda get what you deserve. Except that they drag me down with them.

All of which means is that I'm kind of dreading the actual election day. Because now, at least, I can still think that there's a hope. After election day, it'll be just more heartbreak, disillusionment, and the crushing knowledge that for the most part, my fellow Americans are a bunch of idiots.

I haven't really been paying too much to the Olympics and part of me wishes I was because it's actually a lot of fun and completely engrossing. However, the little things that I've caught has reminded me just what I don't like about watching the Olympics. It seems that everytime I turn it on, it's either the American women's softball team or those American beach volleyball players. Both of them tend to kill their opponents meaning it's barely competitive. And beach volleyball is kind of a dumb, made up sport, and softball is a sport in which we should be kicking everyone's butts because it's our game and we're probably the only country that produces women who really care about playing softball. So, basically, what you got is a lot of events featuring American's kicking other countries butts in silly sports. Now, I'm sure other people get off on watching American's kick people's butts in not very important sporting events (U-S-A! U-S-A!) but I don't. I actually like watching us being competitive, even occasionally losing, in sports that seem a bit more traditional.

Either that or team handball.

Earlier, I had mentioned that I wasn't so sure cats were meant to be house pets. The idea being that they might not be so ideal of a domesticated animal because they don't appear to really care if they are or not. One thing I've learned, though, is that the they do have an incredible value just for their ability to entertain you for minutes on in by not doing much of anything. As a friend pointed out, cats are perfect animals for stoners not just because they're low maintenance but because they're kind of stoney themselves.

It's all about that aura of self-possession that they have. A cat will suddenly get up, go over to another place, then lie down again as if it perfectly makes sense to get up from one spot to another. Same thing with say suddenly jumping up on top of a bookcase. They just get up from where they are and move over to another place for reasons unknown only to them. This is especially true, when like my cat, they decide to go chasing imaginary mice. Of course, chasing imaginary rice is ridiculous and often extremely silly to watch, but when a cat goes about doing it, they make it look like there is totally a mouse right there and if you don't see it, that's not their problem.

Basically, what makes a cat so entertaining is that you find yourself spending hours just trying to figure out what the hell they are doing.

And, ick--- it appears I am now turning this into a blog about my cat. My have some things changed.

I've been reading my posts from seven years ago (Christ, it's been that long?) and it's kinda scary to read through. Some of it even painful. In doing so, I've discovered that:

-I'm not nearly as good as a writer as I thought I was
-I can't believe I revealed as much as I did
-I forgot about my unhealthy obsession with the Real World and the Real World/Road Rules competitions.
-I wrote way too much about politics
-Buffy too
-I wrote good reviews of not just "Signs" but "Attack of the Clones"
-I really came off as one depressed, angry, angst-ridden person who couldn't sleep and subsisted entirely on coffee and alcohol. As a result, the writing make me come off like one big, huge raw nerve, exposed pretty much everyone to read.

Good stuff.

Still, most of it comes off as the kind of thing one writes in their journal with all the encompassing embarrassment that comes with it.

The thing I'm realizing too is that there's a lot of stuff I let out and a lot of things I never got to write about and how that time was really much, much worse than I wrote about.

Oh, one more thing-- I started this here blog in October 2011, a few weeks after 9/11. During the time I was writing it, we went through umpteen terror alerts, two wars, all sorts of craziness. The blog is actually interesting in that it's a somewhat interesting time-capsule-- Life in post 9/11 America. Those were some weird and whacky times.

For those of you wondering just what I am doing with my unemployed ass all day, here's what I got going on today. Basically, my cat has worms and when I called the vet, I was told that I should bring a stool sample over to the vet so they could send it out to the labs to determine what medicine to give him. Unfortunately, there's not really any stool samples available right now so I'm basically sitting around in my pajamas waiting for my cat to take a shit.

More looking for a job stuff. This'll be it for awhile-- I swear.

-Three hour interviews suck. SUCK. And not exactly fair. Because while I'm sitting there getting more and more exhausted and mentally fried and while my vocal chords and being ripped apart, the people I'm meeting with aren't because they're only meeting me in 20-30 gaps. So they have a lot of energy. I could also say that I should probably get some extra-bonus points for having to deal with an HR person who didn't give me any details and told me I was interviewing for the wrong job, plus having to drive to and from Palo Alto but you never get extra credit for anything.

-And speaking of which, I've been getting a lot of "why do you want to work for this company" type of questions lately. Well, because it's a job and I'se gotta be paid. Actually, for some companies (video game company or home electronic companies) that's easy to answer. Not so easy if it's for, say an architectural firm ("I always wanted to be an architect") or a company that makes medical equipment ("why, I've always been fascinated by x-rays").

-Going back to that place where I interviewed last week, the one that told me I was both too qualified and not qualified enough for the job, I went back and re-read posts about the time I interviewed there years ago and discovered that the same thing happened-- first they said my resume had too much experience and then they said I didn't have enough experience. In other words, that company is fucked up, yo. Also, what was weird about that interview is that the first person I met with thought enough of me that she left the interview and ran to her desk to hand me her business card. Somebody who doesn't want to hire another person would not do that, right? Which means the decision went down to the last person I met with who, apparently, told my recruiter that I was too "low energy." Whatever that means. Funny thing is that the dude who interviewed me looked like the kind of person who like nothing better than to kick back in his cabin in Tahoe and popping open a Sierra Nevada while listening to the rocking sounds of Dave Mathews after a full day of skiing. In other words, I don't exactly see that guy as being very high energy himself. So, whatever.

Most places that I've lived in the city have been pretty quiet, or at least in terms of hearing your neighbors. My last apartment, in the Mission, was almost sound-proof in that I almost never heard my neighbor and only occasionally heard the people downstairs.

This isn't true of my new apartment, which is why it was a little disconcerting to have to spend the night hearing my upstairs neighbors get into a loud argument and then a loud bout of make-up sex.

So for those in the know, the big song out there, well one of the big songs out there is this song "I kissed a Girl" by Katy Perry. Unlike the pervious "I Kissed a Girl" song that came out in the late 90's which was kinda Lillith Fair and written from the perspective of somebody who was most definately bi, this song is not. It's more "OMG! I was drunk and made out with Becky! I'm so cool"

The thing about the song it shows the complete mainstreaming of the idea of girl on girl action. It might even be the tipping point into Shark Jumpage (how's that for mixed cultural referential cliches?). How can girl on girl action be considered outre if there's a friggin' Top 10 hit about it?

Which brings us with two points

1)If I were a parent, it's yet another reason to fear for my kids
2)Something tells me this song gets played at a lot of frat parties. A LOT.

Okay, here's todays job fun.

I finally got the information about the interview late yesterday evening (around 9). But there was still no information about exactly what the interview was for. Remember, I didn't know how they got my resume and there was two job postings on the companies' web site that were completely different but for which I both could have applied for (one was project managing, the other one content management on the website).

This morning, before the interview, I wanted to make absolutely positively sure I knew which job I was to interview for and so called the guy up just to confirm. He told me it was definitely the web related job. With that, I printed out the relevant resume, studied the job description, and worked on my responses and headed all the way down to Palo Alto to do the interview.

Funny little thing happened when I got there-- he told me the wrong job. It was the project management position.

Luckily, I found out early on when I met the first person I had to meet with and said enough things to make me realize the guy was an idiot and quickly made adjustments. But because I studied for the wrong job, I was kind of shooting blind in that I wasn't sure what the details of the job were. But whatever.

Okay, onto the interview. The whole thing started at 11 and I was supposed to meet with 6 people over the space of three hours. At 11, which meant it was right in the middle of lunchtime. Hello yummy, greasy egg brunch. Anyways, if you haven't done one of those three hour interview jobbers with six different people, let me tell you-- they're fun. Really fun. I told the same stories at least three times, answered the question "what are your strengths" at least four times and answered the question "tell me a little about yourself" four times. After awhile, that story you tell and that response you have gets kind of boring and it's hard to be exciting and show energy when you've told the same story again and again and again.

But wouldn't you do better answering the question since you had to do it so many times? Well, you'd think so except for the fact it's friggin exhausting talking to all that people throughout the experience. First you have energy, then you lose energy,k then you get your second wind, then you get tired, and then you get your third wind and so on and so forth. And somewhere close to hour 1, my brain went from clear to completely muddled and English often became problematic.

Oh, and my poor, poor throat. I talked straight for pretty much three hours and have you ever gotten to the point where there's no spit in your mouth and your throat is starting to hurt and everytime you speak, you could literally feel each individual strand of your vocal chords shredding? That was me today. Luckily, everytime I hit the point where I was absolutely unable to speak anymore, somebody piped in and gave me a reprieve for a few minutes.

And finally, I leave you with this. For the very first time in all the interviewing I've done, I asked to go to the bathroom in the middle of the interview.

Good times.

Yes, it's a busy day...

On Monday I got a call from somebody about a job. Now the thing is that when companies post their job on craigslist, most of them use an anonymous email address and often don't mention the company. As a result, it's often hard to tell who the company is that you're applying to so when you get a call about a job, oftentimes you don't know what the job is. You just have to hope that the person who calls you mentions it when they call or you can figure it out what the job is by playing detective online.

This time around, I couldn't figure it out.

I went to the companies web site and looked at the job postings. On the site, I found two somewhat different jobs, both of which I could have applied to. So now I'm even more confused as to what the job is I'm interviewing for as it could be either one.

The guy who I talked to on Monday said he wanted me to come in on Thursday and Friday and would let me know as soon as he can coordinate with the people who would meet with me. As of 4 this afternoon, I hadn't heard from him so I called. When I reached him, he told me that I had an interview at 11 AM tomorrow morning (that being Thursday). Well, good thing they told me that as some people might find that information useful. Luckily I had nothing planned so there I go.

He then told me that he'd email me the information about the interview, things like where to go and whom I'm meeting with and the schedule. As of 7:30 this evening, I haven't gotten that email.

So, all I know is that tomorrow I have an interview somewhere in Palo Alto for some unknown job with a bunch of unknown people for an unknown amount of time. Other than that, I'm golden.

Make mad.

Alright, so I'm posting a lot today. What can I say, I'm bored, have a lot to get out, and feeling the need to start writing again.

Anyways, I have a phone interview in about an hour. Since I think one of my problems with interviews is that I get too nervous, I realize that I have to find ways of not coming off as nervous and more loose. And since I'm home and there's some beer and some Jameson's lying around......

Hey, it's an idea. Much better than my career councelors idea, mainly to get myself in an interview frame of mind by dressing up like I'm having an in-person interview.

Remember that job in which two recruiters tried to get me in? The one in which the first recruiter took their sweet time and the other one didn't? And remember how the company that took their sweet time to get me in couldn't because they did such a good job hyping me up that the company thought I had too much experience for the job?

Funny thing-- I had the interview yesterday with said company and already heard back. Apparently, they thought I had too little experience for the job. So, to sum up-- I didn't get the job because I somehow had both too much experience for it and not enough experience for it.

I guess this is my fault because after being told that I didn't have enough experience, I tried to play down my experience in the interview because of the previous feedback and was afraid they'd go back to their original assessment of me. I was so sure they'd ask me why I wanted that job because of that problem that I even had a pat response for it.

Now this might seem like a mistake in my part but I was pretty sure it was the right angle to play because....

-the first agency told me that the job description I got was wrong and that job pretty basic
-because the company that let me go two months into my contract let me go because they they only needed somebody who could do the basic stuff and they thought I had too much experience to do the basic stuff
-the position was listed as Jr. to Mid
-The salary was way (way) below the standard hourly rate of somebody with the kind of experience they appear to be looking for, so much so I was ambivalent about the job because it would have been a huge pay cut. On the application form I had to fill out for the job, I even left the question "what was your previous salary" blank. Stupidly, I thought low hourly rate = not that much experience needed.

Oh, one more thing- it was a job that was supposed to last for 3-6 months and that, apparently, was it. In the interview, they mentioned that they were having problems filling the position because everybody they hired left before their contract was up. I guess they haven't quite figured out yet that a short-term position with low salary might not be enticing enough to keep their contractors from staying there. Go figure.

Fear the surprise phone interview. There you are, in your pjs, playing on Facebook while reading about John McCain entering his wife into a wet t-shirt contest and the next thing you know you're answering questions about "what are your strengths?" It's hard to answer said question when you're not quite mentally prepared to answer those questions and you're mind is still wrapping your head around the idea that John McCain spoke at a biker rally and somehow that's considered a good thing in politics.

Fear it too because you have no idea who the hell you are talking to about who the hell knows what job and you just have to guess on what they want to hear.

The other day I was at the gym and worked out behind some woman wearing one of those tribute type t-shirts that one wears at some sort of walk to honor a friend. The front had the type of walk it was for-- either for lung cancer or breast cancer-- and the back had a list of the friends who were walking in that person's name. But as I kept on watching her, I started to wonder just how much of a tribute it is to their friend that the tshirt used to honor that person was now being as gym tshirt

As I stumbled upon new promos for the revised and revamped 90210, promos consisting of the famous guitar riff and "hey, bro" handshakes, I finally figured out why the remake is such a dumb idea. Besides the fact it's a remake, of course. The thing is that the promo shows that the people behind the show are doing the remake with the idea that the people who watched it back then watched it because it was good. The show was not good--not good at all. In fact, most people watched it because it was bad and the very definition of cheesy, that being something that was done with just enough serious intent and earnestness to make the awfulness entertaining. Just look at the infamous guitar riff and hand-slapping credit sequence of the original show-- it consisted of an over-the-top guitar hook that was done to sound rocking but was definitely not combined with images of people trying to look cool who were most definitely not.

So the promo has the same sort of look and feel of the original show, which is good, right, because it'll mean the same fun, right? Well no, because in doing the promo that way, it comes off like they actually think the entire title sequence was cool. And if they thought the opening sequence was cool, then they probably thought the rest of the show was cool and that people watched it because it was cool when they most definitely watched it because it was definitely not cool. In other words, they're redoing something people watched ironically unironically.

But wait-- if they're doing is just like the original, wouldn't it be the same amount of cheesy fun? No. It makes it a stupid idea.

So let's see, in the past two weeks Obama went overseas to find that everybody loves him, the Iraqis back his withdrawl plan, the Bush administration is now doing what Obama said he'd do and talk to the Iranians, and John McCain sorta begrudgingly said he kinda agrees with Obama's plan. In that week, McCain rode around on a golf cart with Papa Bush, showed up at a bunch of sausage houses, and had part of his cheek removed.

This week, McCain released a series of incredibly juvenile commercials which said a whole bunch of things that were so wrong even the press called him out on it and a reporter for the Washington Post got a quote wrong and despite the fact that everybody said he got the quote wrong, the quote is now considered fact. End result, of course, is that despite everything-- and I mean everything-- McCain and Obama are now tired.

So what have we learned from these past couple of weeks

-The Republicans excel at really nasty, awful, dispiriting campaigns
-Which work
-Because the American people are idiots
-And I need to stop paying attention to politics as much as I do.

Still....all of this makes me want to cry. Not to mention drink heavily til november.

I know I've fucking bitched about this before, but I'm in the process of trying to apply for a job with a big company. Like most big companies, I have to go online to their site to do it. Fine.

But first I have to set up my account which means creating a name and password and I have to choose a certain password and then have a question set up in case I can't remember my password. While I'm glad for internet security, I'm applying for a job, not entering in my bank information. Just fucking set me up-- I really doubt somebody's going to go into the system and play with my resume for shits and giggles.

Now this is where the real fun starts. First I have to upload my resume. Fine. Then I have to fill in my contact information (which is on my resume, but whatever). This is always great fun because sometimes your allowed parenthesis in phone numbers, sometimes not but they don't tell you so you have to guess then re-enter and re-enter again to figure out what form they want phone numbers in. Same thing with salary-- do you include a $ or not and how do you hours if they don't accept hours? But then you always miss something but instead of giving you a list of what you've missed, it tells you one thing at a time so if you miss a few things or get something wrong, you have to keep on re-entering and re-entering again. Kiss ten minutes of your life goodbye.

But here comes the fun part- these sites usually try and gleam things from the resume and fill out things in the online form. Which is what this site requested of me. Thing is, I already uploaded my resume so why do I now have to fill these things out. After all, they asked for my resume so they should have all that information. But if they wanted me to fill it out by hand, they didn't really need to ask me for my resume, now did they?

Now sometimes when you do this, the system figures it out correctly and the jobs are all listed in order. This was not the case of this site which somehow managed to miss the first two jobs on my resume. So after reading through the instructions (again, I've already uploaded my resume) I figured out how to add those two jobs, move them up to the cue. And, naturally, they ask for all the information I've already provided on my resume so I have to enter all that stuff again. But even the jobs that they got right, just in different order still missed all the pertinent information so I have to enter all of that information by hand.

So what's the fucking point of asking me to upload my resume if they want me to enter all that information anyways on the site? And if they were going to do it, or at least try and pull things from my resume, couldn't they have at least made sure it was correct instead of incorrect so I'd have to waste another fifteen minutes just filling out information I've already provided.

I finally got past that point, then filled out some more boxes and information and then went through another round of security. Half an hour (!!) later, I had finally officially applied for that.

Half an hour of my life wasted just because of their stupid, lame, web site. For a job, I'll probably never hear back from. Unless, of course, everyone else applying gave up halfway through like I almost did and I was the only person to have gone through the whole awful thing.

Okay, follow the bouncing ball here.....

That job, the one in which the agency putzed around and couldn't get me in for an interview? Well, funny thing about that. They finally heard back from the HR person about me coming in for an interview and it turned out that they did such a good job of playing me up that the company didn't want me to come in because they thought I was too experienced (which is probably true, but what of it?).

Which is bad.

Except for the fact another agency, one that just throws resumes out there without putting much work into it sent my resume in too. Without hyping me. So guess who has an interview next Tuesday?

But yeah, I'm probably overqualified and the pay isn't as good as before, but it's always nice to feel wanted.

I sent an email to that place I've interviewed twice at asking where they are in the process as supposedly they'd let me know be now. Below is the email I got in response. So, for the fun of it, and because this is how my brain works, let's break this sucker down on a semiotics/neurotic level.

Thanks for your note.

Okay, their being polite, that's good, right? Or does it just mean their being polite?

We are in the process of getting resumes from internal candidates and should start interviewing soon. I will keep you posted!

On the one hand, they're still interviewing people which is a bad sign because if they wanted to hire me, they wouldn't be collecting more resumes for people to interview. That's not a good sign. On the other hand, they haven't hired anybody yet so I'm still in the running. If they didn't really like me, they might have said something about "hiring people internally" or some such nonsense to tell me to forget about it.

Also, she mentioned earlier that they wanted to interview people internally and since they brought me back for the 2nd interview so quickly (based on a thank you note I sent in) maybe it just means that they like me enough to bring me in faster than they planned and they're still going through the process? Or maybe they have to interview internal people because it's company policy and it's just like a box they have to check? That's good.

But on the other hand, companies like to hire people internally. Or maybe they really liked me before but not enough to interview people? She also said they were trying to hire somebody fast and if they're collecting resumes, that means they're not going to hire somebody really fast and they didn't like me enough to hire me. That's bad.

But, she did use an exclamation point at the end so, once again, she's being really polite so it's not like she doesn't like me.

Or maybe it is what it is and I should just calm the fuck down. And not drink so much coffee.

Now here's what I mean about cats. Whenever the cat decides that Harlan and I should wake up and spend time paying attention to him, I try and get back him the next day by trying to wake his ass up everytime he falls asleep. So everytime I go into the bedroom and he's lying on the bed, I make it a point to either meow at him, make some sort of loud noise at him, or just pet him.

This morning, I did as I always did and tried to wake his ass up and as a result of said action, I got a little love bite from him letting me know it was not appreciated. But here's the thing-- he wakes our ass up and we have nothing we can do about it other than telling him he's a bad kitty, something that not only doesn't work with cats but usually only encourages them. So, to sum up: him waking us up is cool. Us waking him up is not cool. And in the realm of things, telling someone "bad kitty" does not work as entirely well as trying to bite someone.

I have a cat now, another sign of my turn into domesticity and adulthood. The cat, officially named Charlie McLovin Harlan, went sort of nuts on us last night and around 4:30 in the morning decided he wanted us to wake up and pay attention to him. So he did a lot of meowing, scratched at the bed, and occasionally leaped up on his hindlegs and with his forepaws, swatted Harlan while she was trying to sleep.

Last night was not a fun night, the kind of night that I'm pretty sure would be something akin to having a new-borne baby.

The thing I've noticed about cats is that I'm not all together sure they're supposed to be domestic animals. Now maybe I'm saying this because I am a full-fledged dog person, but dogs definitely act like a domestic animal should be-- happy to see you, easy to play with, and fully capable of giving affection back. Cats, on the other hand, seem ambivalent about all such things. In a way, cats often come off either like moving furniture or like roommates you live with whom you kind of like to hang out with but also leaves the dishes out too long and invites friends over at all hours of the night and sometimes you'd like to strangle them.

What I mean is that unlike dogs, cats seem to be completely content with living in their cat bubble world and do nothing but sleep, eat and chase imaginary mice. That's all they want to do and come off like that's all they really want out of life. Oh sometimes they'll hop on your lap or curl up with you, but it's always on their terms, never really on yours. When you want to pet them or play with them, they usually tolerate it more than anything else. Charlie will give us a roll of the eyes and let us pet with him or give us a really annoyed look, like "Jesus, people not again-- can't you seem I'm trying to sleep?"

Now none of these things are wrong, in fact it's why some people like cats, especially since it makes them low maintenance. It also makes people think cats are smarter which always struck me as retarded (the argument always boils down to how people say that, yes, dogs can do tricks but that's because they're dumb. Cats are smarter because while they could do tricks, they choose not too because they're too smart to play silly little pet games. Which is akin to me saying I could do physics if I wanted to, but I'm too smart to apply myself to something as silly as physics).

On the other hand, cats are awfully cute and sometimes you just want to pick them up and squeeze them like they're nothing but a live stuffed teddy bear. Which is probably why they always look so irritated when you do pick them up.

None of this, however applies to Charlie. Because Charlie is the most wonderful, loving, handsomest cat EVER.

So I'm waiting to hear back from that place I had a second interview with last week. And yeah, it's been a week since I interviewed there (gulp). The way I figure it is if I got the job, I'd get a phone call. If I didn't, I'd get an email. So right now, everytime I check my email, I'm saying a little silent prayer that I don't get an email from my contact at the job. And everytime the phone rings....

Anyways, last night I watched "the Incredibles" on the Disney Channel. Love that movie. But in watching it on the Disney Channel, I was subjected to a lot of commercials about shows on the Disney Channel. While watching them, I couldn't help notice that most of the shows, primarily the one's aimed at "tweens" were mainly about being rich (that Zack and Cody show), being famous (Hannah Montana), shopping and fashion (pretty much everything).

As I was watching all this I thought back way back when and wondered what kind of shows I was subjected to back then and what they were about. Other than that show "You Can't Do That on Television " (the show where people got slimed) I couldn't really remember any show which was geared towards my being a tween or a teenager. I guess that's what happens when you're just old enough to live at the start of the cable era. I did have, however, MTV but back then MTV actually played videos and didn't focus on shallow people doing shallow things. Mainly, all that we had to watch were the Brady Bunch and Gilligan's Island.

Which brings us back to the point I was trying to make, about the fact that most of the shows aimed at kids today focus on nothing but materialistic things whose emphasis is somehow related to having money and spending. And fame. Oh, I'm sure that each show, many of which are sitcoms, all end with some sort of lesson being learned but what sort of lesson can be learned if the whole point of the show is that you suck if you're not rich and can't go shopping for fashionable items.

Now I'm not saying that Hannah Montana should be a show about a teenager who volunteers to save refugees in Darfur or "the Green Life of Zach and Cody" but one still has to wonder just how more and more fucked each upcoming generation will be.

And, yes, get off my lawn you damn kids.

Yay, it's job stuff!

-I got a call from a recruiter about one job with a big company that I interviewed with way back when, a place that caused all sorts of problems (I think I mentioned this earlier, no?). Anyways, instead of just sending my resume over, the agency asked me to come down to their office and sign a few papers and meet with them. Then they wanted to check my reference meaning nothing happened for a few days as they and my old boss played phone tag. After that, they wanted me to do what basically was a cover letter that they could also send to the company. All of which meant that it took them about a week after contacting me to send over my resume. Not so surprisingly, they never heard back from the company and no interview for me. Now, part of me makes me wonder if I would have gotten a foot in the door if the company DIDN'T FUCKING DAWDLE IN SENDING OVER MY RESUME.

Ahem.

-I also got a call from another agency saying that lo and behold, the place that had recently let me go was looking for the same sort of position I did. Something happened over there and they needed somebody to help them out for awhile (I found out from a little birdie there that somebody just up and left due to a family emergency). The recruiter saw my resume, thought I'd be a good fit, and called me. I, of course, was a little stunned (especially after I had told everybody to give me a call if they need me) and told the guy what happened. Both of us felt that since I was let go because the project I was working on got cut, that it would make pretty darn good sense to bring me back on board, me knowing the job and all.

Naturally, the place said they didn't want to bring me back. So, instead of bringing on board somebody who they liked and did a good job (I had weekly one-on-one's and never heard a discouraging word) and who also knows how the place works, they decided they'd rather go ahead, bring in a few people to interview, and then spend a month or two to train them.

Which means
1) They still think that I can only do the project they hired me for and still think I'm overqualified to do anything else and so would be bored and unfulfilled. If so, gosh, once again thanks for thinking of me.
2)There was a little more going on both when I left and while I was gone than I knew. Which makes me a little paranoid.
3)They're really stupid.

Any of these three could possibly be the reasons why. From what I've heard, they actually are pretty stupid.

Oh, there's one little thing I can also think of. See, there was about 11 people who worked in the department I worked in. I was the only guy. While it's not true of everybody who worked there, the vibe of the department was definitely married suburban moms who love cats a little too much. And Disney. I, on the other hand, am a sports-loving, ex-Mission dwelling, snark infested, Y chromosome carrier. Every once in awhile I think that I got let go primarily because if one were to do a "one of these things is not like the other," I'd definitely be "the one"

So I just watched Obama's speech in Berlin. It was, as always, lyrical, passionate, intelligent, inspiring and sophisticated showing a world view that completely depicts the way the world is now. In other words, I'm getting more and more sure by the day that McCain's going to win.

I had an interview this morning so to prepare for it, I read a bunch of sites on how what types of questions are usually asked and how to respond to them. For every major question, there is a pat response that not only are you supposed to know, but have memorized to the point that, as one site said, you could recite if awoken at 2 in the morning. The point of some of these questions is to sound as confident as possible and the point of some of them is to not actually answer the question asked. One of the pat responses, in fact-- the one about the always tricky "what would you consider one of your weaknesses", became so well known that it doesn't work anymore and so lately another pat response is being suggested, one that says the same thing as the previous pat response but in a different way.

The result of this is that in a way, an interview is just a verbal test, like the kind you had in history or math class. Your asked a question and your supposed to answer with the correct answer. Answer correctly, you get a point. Answer incorrectly, you lose a point. It's just yet another hoop that you're supposed to jump through. You could also say that it's like running for politics in that every politician is told to give the campaign talking points no matter what the question is. This keeps them from saying something they shouldn't (like their own opinion or reality) and keep them out of trouble. It's no surprise that most winners in an election are the one's who stick to the script. It's also no surprise that people are completely turned off by it because everybody sees right through it.

Now while this makes senses to the interviewee, it doesn't seem quite right for the interviewer because they know for whatever question they ask, the response they get is primarily a bunch of BS some book told them to say. None of this is in any way helpful to the interviewee because they never really get a true perspective of that person. Like say somebody's main weakness is they have a short temper and have a tendency to yell at people for no reason. Now this would be something a potential employer would want to know but since nobody is going to answer the question "what would you say is your weakest skill" by saying "I tend to yell at people all the time," the employers would never know that until they hire that person and watch them yell at people all day.

So how'd I do today? B+ at best. I just have to hope somebody doesn't get an A.

Oh, I talked to about three people (two of them via conference call) and everybody ended the conversation by saying "good luck." Now does that mean "we really liked you so good luck in the interviewing process because we're rooting for you" or does it mean "there's no way we're going to hire you so good luck out there." Or does it mean nothing at all?

Nah....nothing in job interviews mean nothing at all.

I guess the big pop culture thing right now is the trailer for a new Disney flick called "Beverly Hills Chihuahua." And yes, that could potentially be the dumbest idea for a movie in the history of moviedom. The trailer in question is....well..... You know the line about how there's a fine line between clever and stupid. The trailer happens to be both at the same time. It's both amazingly awful and amazingly brilliant all at the same time and it's impossible not to watch it over and over again mainly to figure out what exactly which one is it. The song in the trailer is also amazingly and cruelly catchy as all hell and sticks in your brain and won't let go.

Anyways, check the trailer out:

http://www.apple.com/trailers/disney/beverlyhillschihuahua/trailer_large.html

Here's something you don't want to hear a few days before a big, second round with a major financial institution, that despite the fact said financial institution has yet to be affected by the things that have caused parts of it's industry to collapse, the collapse is dragging down it's stock to the point that everyone who works there is afraid of layoffs.

And I know certain people might consider it "whining" but I had trouble with getting unemployment mainly because I recently moved. I tried calling Unemployment to figure it out so I could start getting put on the dole but I couldn't get through to anybody. I didn't even get a "your wait will be two hours" message, it was basically like "yeah, your call ain't happenin'" So, in order to get through to somebody, I went to the unemployment office where I was told that the only thing I could do was to use one of their phones because apparently the only way to get through to the call center is to use the unemployment office phones. And despite all that, I still had to wait ten minutes before I could get somebody on line. I know, it's all in my head, but shouldn't it say something that people who are unemployed can't get through to unemployment because there's too many people who are unemployed trying to get through to unemployment?

You know, I don't know why they hire all these fancy-pants economists to analyze the economy. All they have to do is ask me.

We step away from the usual daily blather to talk politics. Why? 'Cause I got nothing today.

Anyways, with the big election coming up, I am even more of a political junkie than usual. And, yes, being a political junkie kinda isn't a very healthy thing to be. The thing is that with the election coming up and with my guy being the candidate, it's really hard to resist paying attention despite the fact I should know by now that it's time like this that create more teeth gnashing and blood pressure rising than anything.

For instance, there's the fact that polls are showing that while most people think the Iraq war is a mistake and want us to leave, polls show that people think John McCain will do a better job in doing so. This despite the fact he's been a major supporter of the war and his belief that we should stay in Iraq forever and ever and ever. This also despite the fact McCain comes off a bit trigger-happy and is a diplomatic crisis waiting to happen for his predilection to make jokes about killing Iranians. Then there's the old perennial, how a huge whopping amount of people keep on saying the economy is the biggest issue and that they really need health care yet prefer the one candidate from the one party that has absolutely no fucking clue as to how to do either. Or has shown any interest in doing so.

Which is kinda why I wish a candidate, upon hearing from somebody in South Carolina or Indiana complain about how they lost their health care when they lost their jobs would tell them "well, you maybe if you weren't so fucking stupid and voted Republican, you'd have health care and a job right now."

So I'm in the jacuzzi at the gym and in the jacuzzi with me is some crone-ish like old lady wearing a bathing suit that crone-like women should not be wearing. Like, if you have liver spots up and down your back, do not wear something without a back. Or, if you're somewhere in your 60's or 70's, do not wear a bathing suits that puts manuevers your breasts into some sort of seductive position.

After a few minutes, she gets up and I kinda watch her get out of the jacuzzi in that some way that you can't turn away from road kill on the street. When she fully gets out and grabs her towel, I notice that one of her arms ends in a stump.

Now, two thoughts

1) I feel really awful for thinking up all that stuff about somebody who is, in effect, handless
2)On the other hand, double ick.

One more thing about the gym, recently I turned 40 (yikes) and while I had a hard time of it when I was 39, now that I'm actually the number, I'm okay about it. Well, as long as I don't think about it. Which is why the only time I really cringe about it is whenever I get into one of those cardio machines and have to plug the number 40 in when it asks me my age.

At what point are you allowed to tell a kid shut up in a children's movie? On the one hand, a kid could be totally obnoxious but on the other hand, it is a kids movie. Why I bring this up is because I saw Wall-E last week (just a phenomenal movie) and there was this kid sitting behind me who had to be around 4 who spent the whole movie blabbering away, kicking my chair, poking her head over hear seat and at one point ran up and down and up and down the completely empty aisle for which she sat. Her mother, as far as I could tell, did nothing much in the way of stopping her. Again, I could have said something, but on the other hand I'm watching a cartoon about one robot falling in love with another robot.

The other thing about all of this is that telling people responsible for making a lot of noise in places they shouldn't be rarely goes smoothly. Whenever you let the person know that they are in effect being obnoxious, you never hear "gosh, you are right. I'll try and be more quiet and I apologize to you and yours for ruining your experience." Instead, what you usually hear is a bunch of curses and invective thrown your way.

A friend of mine told me a story about having seats at a Shins concert. In front of her and her friends sent this dad who was there with his two teenage sons. The dad was obviously not into the music and so spent the entire concert on the phone with friends, blabbing away. When one of my friends' friends asked him, politely, to get off the phone and shut the fuck up, he got cursed at and then spent the next few minutes yelling back and forth with the dad.

Which brings up my situation because there is nothing-- nothing-- that is prone to explosion like a mother called on her parenting skills. You just do not go there. What I mean is by turning around and asking her to control her kid, you are, in effect, calling her a lousy parent who can't control her kid. And what mother wants to hear that? And it's not just on a personal level, but you are never supposed to question anybody about their parenting skills (unless their child happens to be a celebrity). It's just not allowed to say anything bad about a child and the child's mother

So I did nothing.

Now you might be wondering, Hooray, just what are you doing with yourself while you're unemployed yet again (for those keeping track, this will be unemployment #4). Well, in unemployment #1, I watched a lot of Read World marathons. In unemployment #2 I watched a lot of Buffy. And in unemployment #3, I watched a lot of Charmed.

So what am I doing right now? Veronica Mars.

Now you might be seeing a recurring theme here, mainly that it's three shows involving women with some sort of secret identity/power who uses their power to help save the world. Or there High School reputation as there's no supernatural aspect to VMars at all. That, of course, would be true.

So why VMars?

Well, when it was on, everyone praised it as the new Buffy, including Joss himself. The show was so trying to be the new Buffy that at various points Charisma Carpenter (Cordelia) and Allyson Hannigan (Willow) were characters on the show. And Joss himself had a cameo. The show also received plaudits from Kevin Smith who also had a cameo. So, in other words, it had good rep. And it's true-- the show features snappy dialogue and a kick-ass heroine. In fact, the show is a combination of things that make Hooray applaud, a combination of John Hughes and Buffy with a little Twin Peaks thrown in for good measure (the first season involved a season-long story arc about the death of Veronica's best friend and High School Princess). Plus, there's a not so subtle subtext of class issues throughout the show and we like shows that point out that rich people get away with a lot more crap than the poor and minorities.

Good VMars.

I could also make a statement about how I prefer female heroes to mail because in being female heroines, it makes them seem even more of an underdog than a male hero (males are supposed to kick ass, after all) but I won't. Instead, I'll just point something else out.

There's a video game I used to play with friends called Soul Caliber. In the game, you get to choose a character and your opponent chooses another character and you battle to the death. Love the game. Anyways, most of the guys I played with took male characters. Because they're males. I always choose the female characters. Why? Because I'd much rather watch a cartoon woman than a cartoon male.

I was just reading through my old blog posts, especially the Unemployment Years and remembering the good old days. Since I'm only in Month 1 of unemployment, I don't have that feeling of my soul being crushed on a daily basis and the bile spewing from deep down in the belly but it's early. Anyways, just to kick it old school, here's a whine about a job...

I interviewed at some big-ass agency last week (see previous post). It was last Wednesday, the one right before July 4th meaning there was only one day left before the holiday weekend started. Now, according to the dude I met with, he was going to report back to HR, interview a few more people, then start interviewing other people in a week or so. Today I got an email from my connection letting me know that they already hired somebody. Which means said timeline was totally BS. And that either they went through that entire process weeks earlier and were about to hire somebody already or they just met somebody in those few days who so blew them away that they said "screw process, let's just hire SOB." Of course, all that stuff the guy told me could have been BS because he didn't want to hire me (remember what he said about the HR person being called into a meeting?) so nevermind. Still....

Here's why politics suck in this country, or at least the coverage on it. CNN had a brief segment on the economic polices of Obama vs. McCain. Yay, actual substantive news stories. It lasted about a minute.

Afterwards, they turned to their panel of experts and instead of debating the merits of each proposal, they instead debated about which candidate is doing a better job of conveying their economic policies to the public. So instead of a substantive debate on the issues, one which should hopefully show that McCain has no friggin clue, they had a debate about stage managing and polls and who connects better with blue collar rednecks. In other words, about nothing in particularly useful.

And I'm sure people at CNN were really proud of themselves for the coverage.

Jesus, it's harder to log onto blogger these days than Bank of America.

Anyhoo, I have Blue Cross. I don't like Blue Cross mainly because they send me a lot of paperwork, most of which I don't understand. Apparently, anytime I see a doctor, they have to send me about three notices to let me know that the visit will be paid, is going to be paid and has been paid. All in confusing manner.

For one doctor, they've decided to send me the check instead of sending it to the doctor. The problem is that the paperwork is so confusing it's hard to tell it's an actual check and I'm pretty sure I've thrown out a check or two by accident. The problem is that the thing looks like a check and even has "Pay to" followed by name next to it but on the right-side of the "check", next to the amount of money the check is, it says "PAY THIS AMOUNT." Now shouldn't they not put "Pay to blah blah blah " And "Pay this Amount" on the same slip of paper? couldn't they just write on it "here's the check to pay for doctor visits to...."? Or does that make too much sense?

Here's one of the things that I had forgotten about unemployment, the level of paranoia that comes with it. Take a job I suddenly threw my hat into the ring for at Super Mondo. In just a matter of a few days I went from the manager saying "give me a call and let's discuss the position" to phone tag to "we're going to offer the job to somebody else-- it's been in the pipeline for awhile, actually."

Now, what happened over those past few days (four in total). Did they really offer the job before I talked to the manager about it? Did it take so long for us to reach each other that he decided in those four days to just offer the other person? Or was there something going on at Super Mondo that I didn't know about. Like people not backing me up or did he not like me or did he not think I did a good on his projects?

Could be nothing, could be something.

Then there was a job interview I had yesterday. At the end of the interview, which I thought went well, the guy I met with said "I was supposed to send you down to the HR person but she got called into a meeting and can't meet with you." Did that mean "the HR person but she got called into a meeting and can't meet with you" or did it mean "no, I'm not going to hire you at all and it's not even worth me sending you to the HR person."

Then there's the fact an ex-coworker works there, one who I sometimes didn't have a good relationship with. Some of it was due to personal issues I won't get into and some others because she kinda sucked and took it out on me and blamed me for her occasional bouts of suckitude. Also, she even took me to lunch and told me that I should be on my toes because they were using a recent bout of layoffs to get rid of people who aren't that good and, well, I should worry.

But that could be water under the bridge, right? By the end of her stint, we were in pretty good terms and the last time I saw her, she was really nice to me. So she could help me, right? Except for the fact she didn't respond to my LinkedIn invitation. Or a mutual friend didn't email me back about getting her email address.

Again, could be nothing, could be something.

And if it's something, what does it mean for my chances at the place? I'm sure the guy I met with thought to himself and said "hey, blah blah worked at Super Mondo too, I should go ask her about Hooray." And if he did, did she say nice things that helped me out or did she say not very nice things out that doomed me. Or maybe he didn't even ask? Maybe just the fact I was brought in and there was a connection there was a sign she helped me out. Or maybe nobody thought of it?

Just thinking about it makes me want to drink some more wine.

Jesus, I swear it's harder to log into Blogger these days than Bank of America.

anyways, you know how I was complaining about that lady who was supposed to interview me, got the date wrong, then never called me back? I got a call from the company yesterday and was told that the person in question "is no longer with the company" which, as we all know, is a euphemism for "fired."

Heh.

Alright, so I heard from a company about an interview I can't really do, but whatever. We first schedule an appt for Friday but I ask if we can move it to Monday because the in-law was in town. The person at the company agreed and said no problem. Except she called on Friday anyways and naturally I couldn't do the interview because I was friggin doing something else, like I said I would. So I called her later that afternoon, she said "whoops, my bad" (which it was-- I have the email saying we'd do it on Monday) and we made plans to call at an earlier time that Monday than initially said. Remember, I had family in town so it's not like I could just peel off and do a phone interview, especially when the time the phone interview was supposed to be was when we'd be at the airport.

Naturally, she didn't call. Not at the earlier time we had agreed upon, nor at the first time we had agreed to. She just didn't call at all.

Naturally, I decided to play this all the way through and emailed the person asking what was up. No response. The job, however, has been posted on Craigslist. So, either they somehow decided between that Friday and Monday that I wasn't qualified or I was deemed unreliable because I wasn't around to take a call I wasn't supposed to take. Or because I was too busy dealing with family to do the phone interview.

Whatever-- that person in question just flat out sucks as does the stupid company she works for.

So I got this email in response to my resume posting on Craigslist. Yes, some recruiter actually sent me an email trying to recruit me to join the army.

This, of course, is funny for oh so many reasons. Among other things, me, in the army? And then there's the fact that the army is so desperate that somebody is trolling Craigslist to recruit people. Now, obviously they aren't doing that much research in looking at resumes because they would notice that I am now 40 and probably not exactly of the age that the army would be looking for. Unless they have really lowered their standards and are now taking 40 year olds.

And, you know, I would even consider it. Or, would if it would be a desk job-- the army has to be full of people who do nothing but work at a desk. And I'd do it if I wouldn't have to go anywhere and didn't have to go through basic training. I'd even wear the uniform and get the haircut. Hell, the army is a recession proof gig and I'm sure it comes with good benefits.


>
> My name is SSG George Heath and I am a U.S. Army Solider. I was
> looking at your resume and wondered if you have ever thought about being
> a soldier. As I read your resume, I can see you have the skills
> necessary to be a successful soldier. Motivated, Intelligent, Hard
> Worker, Dependable and Responsible these are all very important skill
> sets.
>
> Now I know your first reaction is going to be Heck no, but
> really have you considered it, ever?
> We have 156 jobs available depending on your scores, but only 19% of
> those are combat related like you might think from the movies. What that
> means to you is that 126 of our jobs are support and customer service
> related.
>
> Plus, we have enlistment bounses as well as full healthcare
> benefits from the day you start. If none of this sounds like it might
> work for you then, I must have been wrong when I read your resume. Have
> a good day.
>

Okay, back by popular demand, it's Hooray for Anything. And, why, praytell are we going again? Because I'm unemployed again!

Hooray for me.

Why am I unemployed again? Long story, suffice it to say typical Hooray for Anything luck in that it involved at least four or five things to go wrong simultaneously to create this situation.

And to start us off, here's my unemployed pet peeve: companies that make you fill out several online forms to apply for a jobs.

Here's how it works, you get a link to the site and the first thing you have to do is to log in and if you aren't already logged in, you have to open up an account. I do not want to open up a new account. I have hundreds of accounts out there and I do not want more. Plus, all I want is to send over my fucking resume, not join a big social-networking group of said company.

So after going through the rigamorale of signing up, you have to go through field after field to enter all the corresponding information. Again, all information that could be determined if one could just send a resume (most places actually want you to fill all the crap out, and then ask for the resume). So I have to go through page after page, filling out information and there's always one field I miss so I have to go back and redo things or get stuck on one page and in the case of one place, got stuck in such a loop I gave up because I had already wasted fifteen minutes trying to log in.

Then there's the case of a place I applied to today in which I apparently had already set up an account despite the fact I had no idea I set up an account there because I had never heard of the place. So I had to first guess my account name, then my password, for which I could not, of course remember despite the fact I usually only three and just rotate them all over the place, and so had to request a password. Finally, I got in. In this site, I had to first upload my resume, and then a page later cut and paste my resume into a box. Now, why the fuck would I have to do both?

Gack.

With American Idol in full force, I have to say I hate this time of year-- Idol season. I call it the Tyranny of American Idol, mainly in that despite all my attempts at not caring at all (I have never watched it nor had any inclination too as I see it as one big karoake show full of middling talents) but since everyone thinks everyone cares, I have to constantly hear about it. In the blogs. In EW. Even on PTI.

At this point, we're almost on the cusp of the "Tyranny of the Hills." I do not care one whit about Heidi and Lauren and Spencer yet I am supposed to care because everybody is supposed to care. The fact I even know who Heidi and Lauren is upsets me. What have these people done to merit such attention, even grabbing covers of gossip magazines as if the state of the Heidi and Lauren feud is equal to our relationship with Iran. Jesus Christ, America.

Harlan and I like to watch VH-1's "Best Week Ever" which for those of you who don't know is a show in which the week's pop-cultural moments are shown and a crew of talking heads snark on it. It's like "I love Last Week." Lately, however, the show is depressing me. For me, part of it is the fact that the whole irony/snark thing has turned to snarking on something as infetisemal as something on the Tyra Banks show. But mainly because the crap that is out there in the vast wasteland is almost offensive in it's awfulness. It's people out there celebrating the lowest of low brow without any sense that what they're watching is insulting.

Thing is, though, is that there was a point where I kinda hopped aboard all of this. In the mighty words of Elvis Costello "I used to be disgusted and now I try to be amused." But now, I'm back to disgusted

I walk around the office a lot. It's part of my job. And as I walk around, I invariably see the same or so people time after time during the day. So the question is, how many times does one have to smile to be socially acceptable? Is one the first time they see them enough? Do you have to smile everytime you see them?

Just curious

Few things from today at work:

Flowers were delivered to the front desk and when I came in from a break, I heard the person with whom the flowers were intended tell the security guard "I don't like these flowers. They're from my ex-husband and we got divorced eight years ago."

Second, I was wondering why can't every voice mail system standardize their codes? One VM system uses 3 as their way to listen to messages. Another 1. And another 7. And to delete, one is 3 and another 6 and so on and so forth. As a result, it's impossible to remember which code goes with which phone and I'm sure I'm not the only one to get impatient and press in the number they remember most and accidently delete their voice mail message. And why is it that some services make you have to listen to the whole message before being able to delete it? I got a phone call this morning from somebody calling in on a Sunday to wish their tennis partner good luck in their doubles match. I did not play in a doubles match. In fact, I don't play tennis and had no idea who called. Yet, I still had to listen to the message despite the fact I knew within seconds it wasn't for me.

So I got a bad feeling about tomorrow's PA debate. From what I hear, Obama is looking pretty tired, peeved, and flustered, something for which I don't blame him considering that he's still got the Muslim rumors going on but in the past month has been called a communist, elitist, unpatriotic at best and an America Hater at worst, anti-white, and an angry black radical. And all that from somebody from his own party. You'd be flustered too. Since he comes off still as a somewhat normal person with an intense understanding of what's wrong with the country and an understanding of just how absurd the political process is, he's gotta be flustered. Wouldn't you? You're sitting around trying to debate health care and they're asking you about wearing a stupid lapel (something for which, btw, his opponents don't wear nor members of the press wear either). In fact, he's showing exactly why I've been kind of dubious about his chances from the get-go, mainly that when it comes down to it, good, intelligent, sophisticated, multi-cultural, honest people will never be elected president because you have to be a cynical, egotist, mainly black-hearted person to win the Presidential election.

And the whole political process works in the same way that those old medevil witch tests go. Ignore comments that you're unpatriotic and the rumor spreads. Take it on and everybody thinks that if he's defending himself, he could very possibly be unpatriotic. Even worse, he's gotta take it from the press, all of it, or he'll get called a whiner or somebody who can't handle the pressure (which he's being accused of now).


Which brings up one of my political fantasies, that finally somebody, whether it be the candidate or the candidate's spokesman to throw shit back at the pundits/reports.

Like if asked about how an inability to bowl well won't help with the blue collar vote-
"interesting question, Chris. When was the last time you ever stepped in a bowling alley"

or asked about whether somebody is too elitist, usually by some rich dude who thinks he speaks for the lower class:
"and how is your million dollar house in Nantucket, Tim?"

or even
"what the fuck do you know, you went to Yale too."

And if asked, again, about whether Rev Wright loves America:
"What the fuck kind of question is that? Seriously. That's the fucking most pathetic question I've ever been asked. Do you know why everybody hates the press? Because you ask fucking ridiculous questions like that. This country is in the fucking shitter and you're asking me questions like this. Stop hurting America."

And the lapel question
"Nice question. When you get home, do you look in the mirror and hate yourself?"

Which brings up my last point. Mainly that everytime there's an election, we always hear about how people want health care and good jobs and all that stuff yet everytime they get a chance to actually vote for somebody who'll do something like that, people always vote for the person who does wear a lap and isn't caught looking away during the Pledge of Allegiance.

So, I'm also waiting for a losing Presidential Candidate to go to one of those places where they stumped and meet up with all those people who whined about health care or about jobs and say to them "how you like your health care, now, bitch"

Yes, I'm back. At least for now.

Here's an email that actually went out at my new job (which I'll get into later)

To All Occupants:

Due to recent incidences, please be reminded not to flush newspapers down the toilet. All newspapers should be disposed of in recycle bins located throughout the building. If you have any questions or concerns, please contact 'Property Management, SFO.'

Thank you,

Sorry for the lack of posting, but in the past few weeks, I have

-Started a new job
-got a new apartment
-got my wallet stolen from the gym.

All in the same week.

In fact, I got news about the apartment on the very-same day I started my new job and I got robbed at the end of that week. In other words, that was one long-ass, crazy-ass week. I feel like my whole life turned upside down and then somebody came by and shook me just enough all my change fell out of my pockets.

On top of that, it's my first new job in four years and my first new apartment in seven years. It'll also be the first time I've lived with someone in 7 years. It'll also be the first time I left the city proper and have moved to the outskirts, mainly the Richmond which means I have bought a fast pass for the first time in about five years.

And all of this means other life-shaking things. Like actually buying a couch and kitchen table. And real art. Or looking at having to get up early for a 45 ride on the 38 Geary L. Or having to call every place for which I have an account with and switch my account information to reflect my new checking account number.

I am exhausted with a mixture of freaked out thrown in for good measure.

And speaking of new jobs, today I remembered another fun part of new jobs, the fact that you're still kind of new and nobody knows you. When you're busy, it's fine because you're running around, being a part of things. But when you're not, you just sit at your desk, bored out of your mind, and contemplate the fact that you're kinda alone. There's no coffee klatch to go get coffee with or people to gossip with or even say hi to in the hallways or ask about their weekends.

It's like being the new kid in school and it's kinda lonely.

So here's my reaction to Obama's brilliant, amazing, thoughtful speech yesterday, a speech so good it'll definately doom him in the election as it once again is proving that he's just too good to be elected. It's basically about a viral video meant to attack Obama as a way to scare whitey:

"The co-founder of Laura Ingraham's radio show who now helps run Hugh Hewitt's 'Salem Radio Network' has mixed an Obama video interweaving Obama with Malcolm X, the Black Power salute at the Mexico City Olympics and Public Enemy's 'Fight the Power'."

And I'm thinking, that's a bad thing?

God, I forgot how God awful the first week of a new job is. It SUCKS. All I'm doing is everyone else's busy work which means I'm doing a lot of photocopying and filing and turning things in for people who are too busy to walk to someone's desk. To say I'm bored shitless would be an understatement. Throw in the fact I can't check email at work (!) and how you can't surf the web when you're new and I'm dying. D-Y-I-N-G.

It's so bad I'm having trouble sleeping because it's hard to look forward to waking up way earlier than your used to and then be horrendously bored for 8 hours.

Lord, help me make it through these first few weeks.

So tomorrow I start a new job, my first new job since August of '04 (imagine that). And I'm kinda nervous and kinda scared and kinda anxiety ridden mainly because all new jobs are hellish and suck. On the one hand, I kinda want to put myself down and go to sleep so that I'll get plenty of rest before the big day. On the other hand, I kinda want to stay up as late as I can just to enjoy all this time in which I'm not dealing with the first day of work.

As we all know (and as I've probably written here before), first weeks suck. There's nothing for you to do, they're not really prepared for you, and so they just sit you at a desk that hasn't really been set up for you, give you a bunch of papers to fill out and a bunch of manuals to read and then you have to spend eight hours pretending that it's the most exciting thing ever and you're so excited to be there. When you're not. Or at least, you're not because you're bored out of your frickin' skull. Plus, you have to pretend that you are a hard worker so you can't spend all that free time doing what most people at work do with free time-- surf the internet.

The other thing is that everything is new so you don't know anybody, don't know where anything is, and don't even really know who to ask. So you have to ask where the bathroom is or where the lunch room is or if there's coffee and snacks there and if not, where do people go and so on and so forth.

Oh, for various reasons, I can't check email at my new job which is GOING TO BE HELL.

One more interview story before I hopefully don't have to post one of these for awhile....

The older I've gotten, the worse my fear of heights has become. Actually, it's not a fear of heights as much as it is a fear of being in a high place when the Big One hits. Anyways, the issue has become big enough that working on the 30th floor of a high rise, something that could happen if I were to get offered the job, would put the job in the negative column. So is the fact that it's prime real estate, huge office, and lots of empty seats. But that's a whole other thing entirely.

Two other things about the interview-

Due to some yummy mexican food the night before and way too many cracker-type substances, I woke up the next morning with a rumble in the tummy. Which had me worried. So worried I spent much of the ride over to the job and before the job wondering just how one extricates themselves from the middle of an interview to run to the commode.

The other thing is that I was really exhausted that day, for various assorted reasons. I got to the interview on time and was just wired enough from coffee, but first they had me fill out a form. That took fifteen minutes, ten of which I spent twiddling my thumbs. Then the first person I was supposed to interview was fifteen minutes late. Now, the thing is that when you start with the interviewin' you're kinda pumped, kinda primed, kinda raring to go. Except for when their late and it's early and your tired and after awhile, you start feeling sleepy. Very sleepy. But the thing is is that you can't look sleepy at all. You can't slump down on your chair, can't put your head on the table, can't even give any impression of doing anything but sitting at the chair in a completely attentive way so that you look eager and gung-ho.

This is not as easy as it looks. Trust me. It's hard to sit there in a prime position when you're mind is thinking three things

-I'm friggin bored
-When the hell are they going to get here? This is driving me crazy
-God, I really have to take a shit.

And so, yes, Barrack Obama Superstar got crushed last night. Maybe the black guy won't win. Of course, I should have known it was meant to be because of what I always expected. Mainly that:

-Inspiring and idealistic always (always) loses to cold, cynical and ruthless
-Celebrity trumps everything so that one person with a famous name will always beat somebody without a famous name
-Never underestimate how much whitey (especially poor, rural whitey) is scared of people who aren't whitey
-Never misunderestimate the intelligence in the American people in terms of believing every random email they get sent to them by their aunt's sister in law


I guess I will vote for Hillary in the election but I have to say that I actually like John McCain better. I at least respect him way more than I do Hillary. All that kitchen sink throwing they've been doing at Obama just gets me under the skin, the misrepresentations, the vague allusions to race, the contorted logic in their arguements. But, as always, it gets to me in that for the most part, people (well, some of them) seem to be voting for her because well they loved Bill and they had a good run when BIll was president so let's vote for his wife! Except for NAFTA. That was on him.

The thing that really sticks in my craw is the whole thing about "experience" in foreign policy. She was the freakin' First Lady. It's not like she was conducting negotiations with the Serbs or the Palestinians yet they make it seem like she did. And then, if you read through things, you discover that she didn't even read the friggin' National Intelligence Report when congress decided to vote on the war, yet she's the one who has more experience in foreign policy. If you look at her record, actually, she has the same votes as McCain and we're guessing a lot of them were cynical votes so she didn't have to be accused as a wuss.

Eh, I'm just bitter this morning.

Got nothing other than two random thoughts--

It appears that one of everyone's favorite smells is the smell of bacon in the morning. Even people who don't eat meat. All of which got me thinking that maybe somebody needs to make some sort of air-freshner thingy which smells like bacon being cooked.

Yum

And the other thing....

After reading way too many stories about this election, it appears to me that there should be a test on whether you are able to vote or not-- if you really do believe Obama is a muslim (based on some random email that they got over the internet) than you should not be able to vote. Because not only do you prove you really haven't paid enough attention to what's going on to deserve to vote, but you are also a fucking idiot.

Oh, here's another work-related story.

I had an interview with some big gaming company, a place I actually interviewed with years ago (something, actually, which is happening quite a lot as I've been interviewing with places I interviewed with years and years ago). Anyways, the place has a huge, huge campus and the recruiter who set up the interview gave me the wrong building. So not only did I get incorrect instructions from Yahoo Maps (the building was way in back, away from the front of entrance and any sign that it was part of said company) but I went to the wrong building. Unfortunately, the campus of the place I was to interview with was huge (HUGE) and as a result, I got lost on the friggin campus and couldn't find the correct building.

Fifteen minutes later and drenched in sweat from frantically running around trying not to be late, I made it to the correct building.

So one of the things about Lost that amazes me is how come none of the castaways have said something like "Jesus Frickin' Christ, out of all the islands we could have landed on, why did we have to land on some crazy-ass island with a smoke monster, some weird science group that is trying to kill us, weird laboratories, and a polar bear on it?"

Anyways, before an interview I actually cut myself shaving. On my lip. First of all, how does one do that? Second of all, OUCH. And naturally, it bled like a mofo so I had to somehow dress all the while trying to keep blood from getting everywhere.

Which I managed to do, thank you very much.

Holy friggin shit, the black guy just might do it. Go, Obama, go!

I would say "yes, we can" right here but I don't want to be that cheesy.

Alright, one job related post, just for the heck of it:

That agency that didn't prepare for me when I went in for an interview? Well, they never returned my emails about the status so I had to hound the person over the phone. Sometimes I'm like that-- if they ain't going to take the trouble of returning calls, then I'm going to make them. Anyways, I got an email from the main person there saying that they decided to go in another direction and so they weren't going to hire for the position.

All things considering, I can see that so I don't think they were BS'ing. Plus, the women sent me an email on saturday night telling me this and I figure if she's emailing me on a work-related issue on a Saturday, there's something seriously going on there.

I actually almost felt like sending her a thank you note just because she took the trouble to email me on a Saturday night.

Since I've heard that this blog has been a bit too depressing lately (and for those who care, the job situation is all good. Also, I haven't felt like writing too much so there's good stuff going on too), here's something I wrote on SFist:

ng the number of beards per customer, multiplying it by the size of the crowd, and then dividing it again by the square footage). The HBQ was not quite Boogaloos high but high nevertheless. We also noticed that there were also a high variety of beards seen, meaning that the beard craze has gone from it's "classic" phase to "gothic" phase.

Like all things hipster, we wondered just how this beard thing works and the meaning of it all. Like, the guy checking IDs at the bar had a very scruffy, mountain man beard that made him look like Zach Galifianakis. Does this make him "hipper" than some dude with just a normal beard just because it was thicker? Is that worth, say, five hipster points on the hipster/coolness scale? And what about the dude we saw riding a bike down 16th street who had some sort of Hasidic Rabbi/Matisyahu thing going? Is that considered the high end of hipsterdom, like fifteen points or twenty, because his beard was way longer than most beards? Would this, then, make him hipper than the guy checking IDs? Then there was another guy at the bar who had a normal looking beard, but topped it off with a Rollie-Fingers style handlebar moustache. How hip would he be considered? Would he be somewhere between the Zach dude and the Matisyahu dude because his beard was normal length or would he be considered hipper because while it is easy to just grow out a beard, doing the handlebar thing takes work and effort?

We could be wrong about all this but our guess was that the handle bar dude was higher on the hipster scale because he was able to attract his faux-mullet wearing, sort of 70's swept-do, girlfriend, Together, they gave off such an aura of hipness that we wanted to stand by them and bask in their hipster, halo-like, aura. We felt cooler just being in the same bar with them. Were these two the offical King and Queen of Hipsterdom? Were they the Patient Zero of hipsterdom, you know the two hipsters in the Mission from which all hipness emanates? Either way, to them we say, well played, hipster couple, well played.

It took us years to figure out how the trucker hat trend worked but unfortunately, we figured it out way after it was trendy. Now that the beard thing is still happening, we'd like to understand it now before it becomes so 2008. Among other things, we want to know if we'd be cooler just by growing a beard. Anyways, can anyone explain all of this to us?

So you know how earlier I said I had a problem with sports shows that had some over-the-top finale by the underdog team that is won with an over-the-top play? That actually kinda described the Superbowl. That play where Eli almost got sacked, then slunk away, then threw that what-the-hell pass that the receiver inexplicably caught was pretty much something you'd only see in those sports movies but never actually see in an actual game.

Except for today.

And as for Tom Petty, he looked a little overwhelmed by performing, which makes some sense as he's not the kind of performer who plays to those kind of big crowds. On the other hand, he's one of the few performers out there anywhere who is in some way pretty much liked by everyone. Not like-like (well, there are a few) but I can't think of many people who don't like him in some way, a pretty rare feat for any musician who's been around for thirty-odd years.

But one thing, though, he played three songs from his one certifiable masterpiece, Full Moon Fever, a disc he actually recorded as a solo artist without the Heartbreakers so I always kind of wondered what the rest of the band felt knowing that he wrote his best stuff without him. The thing about that album, though, is that it doesn't really hold up that well because it was produced by Geoff Lynne who is without a doubt the worst producer to ever set foot in a recording studio- all that cheesy overdubs and fake background singing all edge being whithered away by whimsical cuteness. Listen to that album now-- it doesn't sound right. Which is why I much prefer "Wildflowers" which I think is a brilliant album, albeit a little too long.

Oy, yes, it's twelve and I'm rambling but today got me all riled up.

So Super Tuesday is next Tuesday and for the most part, Tuesday is Go time in the election. Whoever does better between Hillary and Obama gets the bead on the candidacy. Obviously, this is of great interest because I've drank the Obama kool-aid and then drank it again.

Despite my affection for Bill, Hillary has kind of bugged me. I don't doubt she'd be a decent President (the bar is mighty low these days) but it's the dynastic portion of her candidacy, the fact that she comes off like she's owed this election that kind of grates. Not to mention that despite the supposed Girl Power symbolism her election would mean, the reality is that she wouldn't be even near where she is if she wasn't married to somebody famous. If her name was Hillary Jones, nobody would care.

But whatever, I'd still vote for her in a general election without worrying about it.

Like a lot of people, however, the past few weeks has grated on me and I don't really like her anymore. I don't even really like her husband anymore. It's like the week before and after South Carolina, the facade was stripped off the both of them, revealing the cynical, calculating, sense of entitlement that lurks beneath them. It also brought back what somebody in the New Yorker referred to as "the circus" those two bring with them.

If you read the press, there's a lot of Obama-mania out there. Republicans breaking down in tears during his speeches, young people getting off of Facebook long enough to go vote for him, lepers being cured just at the sound of his voice. At this particular moment it actually looks like somebody who does represent major change and hope, a candidacy based primarily on idealism than anything else might actually win.

But, of course, he won't win. Because cynical and calculating always beat idealistic. Because our election system is severerly twisted and beaten and is geared towards the lowest common denominator winning. And because the mass of voters out there still think "Oh, it's a Clinton-- I've heard of her. I've heard a little about Obama but I've been too busy watching American Gladiator to pay attention to the election."

Just you wait and see.

So today I had that interview with that place that kind of forgot to let me know that they wanted to bring me back for another interview. When I got there, they didn't really have a record of me coming in for the interview. Something which I kind of expected, actually.

Luckily, some dude appeared out of nowhere, said he was the guy who had an interview, asked me if I was him and then off to the interview. Thing is, though, the HR person didn't really tell him who I was. Or what I was interviewing for. Or pretty much anything-- he just got some email saying he had an interview at 5. He hadn't even seen my resume. So, with all that, he just basically said "well, whadda ya got for me?" and I went on to do usual shpiel, trying to say whatever I thought I needed to say from what I had figured out about what they were looking for. At the end, he said "I'm good," ran off to check in with the HR person to see if there was anything else they needed, and with that, the interview was over.

Again, none of this was that much of a surprise.

Yeah, I know, companies are never as desperate to hire somebody as much as the interviewee is desperate to be hired. Still, if you're going to make somebody leave work early, rush home from work while driving in a nasty rainstorm, and drag their ass over there for an interview, the least they can do is make some sort of effort. It's kind of, well, kind of disrespectful. It might not that important to them but it is to the person who is doing all that. Which, of course, matters not to anyone who sets these things up. I'm pretty sure an HR person has never said "Gosh, we didn't quite treat that person that well, maybe we should apologize or go out of our way to help him if we bring them in for another interview?"

All of which is another reason why HR people roast like pigs on a spit in hell when they die.

Okay, so you're Luke Skywalker. As we all know, at the very last second and with the fate of the rebel alliance on his shoulders, he let's the force be with him and switches off his radar as he fires the torpedo down the shaft of the Death Star. A pretty ballsy move if you ask me, if only because if he missed, the planet would have been destroyed, the Death Star would still be in operation and only a rag-tag fleet of planes would be able to assemble somewhere else to continue on with the rebellion, their forces depleted. And if that all happened, Luke would then have to explain that the reason why he turned off the radar, or whatever that was, was because he heard the voice of a half-senile old man in his head telling him to trust his feelings.

I'm guessing that wouldn't go over very well.

So I'm watching the tv coverage of Obama beating Hillary in SC and everyone seems mystified that Obama won such a majority of black voters. And again, you just want to shout at the tv "that's because he's black you motherfucking idiots. Why wouldn't he get all of their votes."

And also, the spin seems to be that Barack only won because he got the black vote and and just chalk it off to him just being a black candidate in a predominately black dominated state, despite the fact they never say something like "well, Hillary won New Hampshire because it's a predominately white state."

Or something like that. Either way, I hate the fucking campaign pundits.

So today is the South Carolina primary and I love how they've been conducting all these polls that show that while Obama is doing very well with blacks, he's not doing very well with whites. So all the pundits and media are trying to figure out what it all means when it's just obvious that the reason why he's not doing well with white people in South Carolina is because, hello-- it's South Carolina.

And, yes, I might be stereotyping a bit, but if you're going to keep the stars and bars and your state flag, you gotta accept everyone calling you a bunch of knuckle-dragging hillbilly rednecks.

And, so, hey, I called that place yesterday, the agency that had me interview for two different jobs at once. I actually got the HR person, which is a little surprising but also presents itself a problem-- I don't think they remember who the hell I am, but what am I supposed to say? So I just say "hi, this is Hooray for Anything..." and left it at that.

She didn't remember me. After a few seconds, she did the "oh...hi...how are you?" with that tone of voice that suggests she still has no idea who I am. So I tell her what I was calling about and what the job title is. A bell sort of went off and she told me they decided to put that position on hold. Oops. But then she rallied and said that one of the jobs (the one I didn't want that much) was on hold but that the job I wanted wasn't on hold and that, essentially, she wanted to bring me back for a second interview but kinda forgot to let me know. Now I have an interview next week.

Here's the thing, though, the fact she completely forgot about me and the job and setting it up could be either bad or good. Here's the breakdown:

Good: she's so flustered that she can't even remember to interview anyone else or invite anybody else, thus clearing a path for me
Bad: She's so flustered that she can't even remember to interview anyone so it'll be months before she puts anything together in hiring anyone.

You know what makes you feel really good when you're about to get laid off? News all over the place that the economy is about to go in the toilet.

Yay?

Anyways, just to keep everyone abreast of the sitch, in the past week, I

-Got an email from a place that blew me off saying they have another position opening up and whether or not I'd like to come in this time.
-Did a phone interview with somebody who came off right quick as crazy. The type of person who asks me about where I grew up and why I came to California before even asking me about my skills on the job. I knew something was up when in an email she asked me if I read Hebrew. Turns out the printing company she works for does a lot of work for synagogues. Now, nothing against synagogues, but I don't see them paying very well. Or being that exciting. Regardless, I don't know why she'd think I'd go from four years doing direct marketing at Super Mondo Corp to direct marketing for Temple Beth Siduit
-Got another email from a company in Santa Cruz. Bad, right? Except they said I can telecommute. Good, right? In all honesty, I dunno. I kinda like the idea of working from home but it's too easy to think you're at home and start doing things you'd normally do when you're home. Like watch tv. Or surf the web. Or go see bargain matinees.

And finally...

Last week I had an interview at an agency. A really good agency. After the interview, I had fallen in love with the place and agency. I thought I did really well in the interview too, with somebody even telling me she'd like to bring me back to meet with her boss. Haven't heard back from them, of course, and I didn't get an email giving me the standard "position is closed" or the line that's really popular these days: we have an internal candidate.

The thing is that I was supposed to go in the interview for an online job, the kind of job I'm looking for. But they threw me a loop and had my first interview be with somebody who does mainly print. Okay, I can do that. I kinda like doing that, but wha? I kept on thinking in my head if I got this job mixed up with another job. Plus, I was all prepared to say one thing but found myself desperately scrambling to say what I needed in this particular interview.

So they leave and in comes somebody to talk to me about an online job. So I switch gears again and talk online, still massively confused as to what the hell is going on and why is it that two different people gave me two different descriptions of the job. It kinda reminded me of the dot.com days when you'd interview for a job nobody quite knew what the job exactly was so you'd hear three or four descriptions of the job while interviewing with people.

Anyways, then the HR person comes in and I actually tell her I'm kinda confused as to what's going on and that two people gave me two different descriptions of the job. You know, to let her know that people are confused out there. Turns out another job opened up and they decided to throw me in there just to see how I'd do.

And how'd I do? Well, naturally, confused.

The pisser of it is that if I knew I was up for the first job, I would have said what I needed to say and probably had a better shot getting that job then the job I interviewed for. Mainly because my interview with the dude was one of the best one's I've had.

C'est la vie.

So I've spent a lot of time over the years looking for work. I've also spent a lot of time being rejected while looking for work. And just when I thought I had heard everything in terms of rejections, from the place that kinda sorta wanted to hire me and kinda sorta wanted to give me another change at the end of January, there comes this:

Hi Jon -- Thanks for checking in. Turns out I am leaving Screwy Ad Agency. Back to freelancing for me! Since we did not make a hiring decision while I am still here, I don't think one is going to get made. I think you'll have to consider this opportunity closed. Good luck to you!