For whatever reason, I've been reading a bit today about the Duggar family, that family of religious nuts in Arkansas (natch) who so believe that Jesus told people to go forth and multiply that they have done so to the tune of 18 kids. If that wasn't freaky enough, the girls are not allowed to wear pants and wear some sort of cloth dress instead and all the kids name starts with the letter "J". And, yes, they are all home schooled.

So I'm imagining something like this as the conversation that happens when Mrs and/or Mrs. Duggar finally goes to the celestial beyond and meets the Big Guy Himself

Duggar: OMG, it's JESUS!!!!!!
Jesus: Yes it is me
Duggar: I know! I'm one of your biggest fans
Jesus: Thank you.
Duggar: In fact, just because of you, my husband and I had 21 kids
Jesus: You did what now?
Duggar: Because you told us to go forth and multiply and because you called children as blessings, we had 21 kids
Jesus: I said that?
Duggar: Uh-uh. And because of you, we had them all start with the letter J!
Jesus: Really?
Duggar: And we wouldn't let the girls wear pants and we home schooled them and made them vow not even to kiss anybody until they got married.
Jesus: Really? No, really?
Duggar: Uh-huh
Jesus: Jesus, you're a fucking idiot.

Oh, and yes, total Idiocracy.