I have this fantasy where one of those douchey right-wing pundits lose their job and their life savings due to the very economic policies called for by their douchey right wing views. They will then have to go out and find a job whereupon they discover that there is not much need in the real world for douchey right-wing pundits. In order to survive, they will have to live on unemployment and take a series of demeaning and random service jobs to keep from running out of unemployment because their influential columns have made influential people in DC think that people don’t need unemployment for long periods of time. They will also find themselves losing their healthcare and having trouble getting coverage because all the heart disease incurred from all those free, lobby sponsored banquets made them too high of a health risk. They will then have to go into medicare but will have trouble with that because their influential columns have made influential people in DC think that the health care system doesn’t need to be fixed.

The children of said douchey right-wing pundit will have to be pulled out of whatever prestigious place of academia for which they attend for either a public school if school age or community college if college age as they will be unable to afford nothing else. Unfortunately for them, even their connections wouldn’t be able to get them into Ivy League Schools as they won’t be able to afford them and all of their influential columns have made influential people in DC think that giving money to anyone who wants to attend college is a waste of tax payer money. As they had said many times, all these sorts of problems could be solved just by simply handing out tax breaks.

They will finally retire somewhere in the mid-70’s after spending the last few years of their life as a WalMart greeter, a company for which they had defended many a time in many of their think pieces but were now paying them barely above minimum wage and refusing to give them health benefits. At one point, they were heard to mutter something about the need for unions or increased benefits for the working class, but nobody listened to them anymore as they were only the mutters of a crazy old coot.

Naturally, they will die bitter and alone, mourned by no one