Monday, January 04, 2010

My New Career?

Found this job posting on Craigslist (parenthesis mine):

Cannabis Dispensary Seeks Purchasing Agent


California’s most professional and legitimate medical cannabis dispensary is seeking a qualified Purchasing Agent.

We are a rapidly growing medical cannabis dispensary. We offer a fast-paced yet congenial and warm work environment, competitive rate of pay & benefits(!).

This position requires extensive experience and an intense passion for cannabis (meaning, a stoner). The ideal candidate spends numerous hours on weedtracker, THCFarmer, and ICMag. This candidate anxiously awaits each new Cannabis Culture and High Times magazine (and a bag of Doritos). If this sounds like you, please read our requirements below.

Applicants must possess:

- Extensive knowledge of medical cannabis strains and applications (dude, this is some kind green)
- Extensive knowledge of different types of molds, mildews, pesticides, additives, and any other contaminants (dude, this is some kind green)
- Excellent communication skills (ever heard a pot head try to talk?)
- Emotional stability and maturity (ever met a stoner?)
- The ability to remain calm under pressure or in intense situations (isn't that one of the points of smoking dope?)
- Tact and respect for others under pressure (dude, mellow out, man)
- Medical cannabis production experience (had a hydroponic grower in the back of their closet in college)
- Complex negotiation experience (dude, you'd reduce the price of the bag for an extra slice of pizza? NO WAY)
- College Degree or Equivalent Life Experience (isn't having an equivalent life experience and going to college the same thing?)
- 3 years of prior experience in customer relations or retail (dealt pot in college to earn money to go to Phis shows)
- A passion to serve the medical cannabis community

Please do not respond if you do not meet all of the above minimum qualifications.


If you think you can meet our requirements, please send an email with:

1. The subject line “Purchasing Agent – [Insert Your Name]”
2. A cover letter summarizing
a. Why you want to work in a medical cannabis dispensary
b. Your previous experience as a Purchasing Agent
3. Your resume

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