We'll spare everyone the gruesome details of easily the worst experience flying I have ever had as it's too long and I'm too burnt out to get into it. So, instead, I'll sum everything up.

Here are the details:

# of planes travelled on- 3
# of planes I was supposed to have travelled on- 2
# of airports- 6 (Baltimore, Greensboro, Charlotte, Vegas, Oakland, SFO)
# of times I was at SFO today -2
# of trains I was on- 4 (Maryland commuter train, BART, BART Cal Trains)
# of times I rode the SFO/Millbrae train this morning- twice
# of airlines- two
# of times I went through security- 3 (one at Union Station, at BWI, and at Vegas, the last time the full pat down)
Time I was supposed to get in last night- 7:30 (PM)
Time I got in last night- 1:30 (AM)
Airport I was supposed to arrive in- SFO
Airport I did arrive in- Oakland
Cost of taxi from Oakland to my apartment due to the fact there was no other way of getting home- $60
Amount of time stuck at the Greensboro airport- 45 minutes
Amount of time stuck at Greensboro airport runway waiting for clearance to take off- 40 minutes
Amount of time I had between landing in Charlotte and making my connection to Vegas- 2 minutes
Amount of gates I had to run through to make above connection- 10 but half of them all the way across a rather large airport
Amount of people at the front gate who had full on panic attacks when they discovered they were placed in a non-aisle seat- 1 (and no, not me)
Amount of people who were at the front gate complaining because they didn't get the first class seat they were supposed to have gotten- 1
Amount of people, including me, who were desperately trying to get onto flight but couldn't find out whether they were on or not due to above craziness- three
Amount of time I was late to work this morning- 1 hour
Amount of time after I got into work that I was thrown into a status meeting/conference call- 10 minutes
Amount of airlines who were able to track my lost luggage- 0
Amount of people for the airlines who weren't able to find my lost luggage- 3
Amount of time it took me to locate my luggage when walking into SFO this afternoon- 0 minutes
Amount of time it took it took for AAA to come and restart my car battery this afternoon at SFO long term parking- 45 minutes

And finally-

Amount of time from the moment I took a cab from the hotel in DC to when I finally got home with both car and luggage and can safely call my trip over- 36 hours.

Hell. It was pure hell.