The Truth is Out There

I watched one of those History Channel Docs this week about "Ancient Aliens" and the belief that aliens came down from outer space and gave people from mainly ancient civilizations some form of highly-advanced technology, technology that seemed to serve no other purpose but to allow those ancient civilizations to build monuments to said aliens. They didn't give them information on how to cure disease or how to build flying devices or computers even, but mainly information on how to build giant heads made out of rocks.

Needless to say, it was awesome. Basically, for every sort of mystery out there in the ancient world, the proponents of the theory came to the conclusion that the obvious answer was aliens. Pyramids? Aliens. Ancient Mayan calendars? Aliens. Easter Island? Aliens. But what made it so much fun is that they said it with such certainty, like how could anyone believe anything but. They legitimately thought that they had a scientific explanation for certain mysteries and were baffled how scientists didn't take them seriously. And, of course, they did so using the completely obvious point that while there is no conclusive proof that aliens did come down and visit Egyptians, there is no conclusive proof that they didn't.

How could you argue?

This got me thinking, though, about what to do with my life. Obviously, cable tv has led to an explosion of shows dealing with the paranormal and other sort of unexplained mysteries. There's plenty of shows about ghosts, demons, aliens, monsters, the Republican Party and there seems to be no end to them. So, I'm thinking that for my next career, I'm going to be some sort of paranormal investigator. How hard could it be? I just need to buy some fancy sort of equipment that sounds really cool (like an EMF indicator or an InfaRed sensor) and say that something you see or hear is definite proof that there's something going on. After all, could anybody see inconclusively that it's not what you say it is?

Weird whispers in an attic? Ghosts. Furniture occasionally moves? Ghosts. Strange light in the sky? Aliens.