For those of you wondering what I've been doing while unemployed, I've been working on a new book entitled "The McMansions of Wrath." In the book, Tom Joad is a Mortgage Broker in Stockton and when he loses his job, he forecloses his McMansion and puts the family into the SUV (wife Jayde and their daughter Madison and their son Logan) and heads out to Oklahoma where there's low unemployment in hopes he can get a job at a local WalMart. On the way, they face such difficulties as having to sell off some of his wife's jewelry on Ebay to pay for gas, an inability to buy batteries for the kids PSPs thus causing much trauma, a lack of internet connection in several KOA campsites, many jokes in his direction at being either gay or a hippy when it's discovered he's from California, having to sell off the kid's Star Wars dvd collection to a pawn shop in Reno when Tom blows half the nest egg on Texas Hold 'Em, and the eventual repossessing of the SUV as he's been unable to pay it off. When he arrives in Oklahoma, he discovers that things aren't as easy as he thought as half of California has also relocated to Oklahoma in search of jobs.
The book ends with a soon-to-be classic speech:
"Whenever they's a fight so hungry people can eat a Big Mac, I'll be there. Whenever they's a cop harassing some dude for having California licenses, I'll be there . . . . I'll be in the way guys yell when their football team scores a touchdown an'-I'll be in the way kids laugh when they're watchin' "Miley Cyrus" an' they know it's time to go to Chili's. An' when our folks eat the stuff they buy at Whole Foods an' live in the houses they've flipped for a profit-why, I'll be there."
Get Me a Bucket
4 years ago