Couple of interesting news stories in today's Comical, none of which I can actually find on their Web site because their Web site sucks.

Jack Ass Blasts "Jackass"- Apparently some guy legally changed his name to Jack Ass. He did this to help his personal crusade against drunk driving. Turns out thatMr. Ass (the Ass Man?) is suing the makers of the TV Show Jackass because, I guess, they are impugning the name Jack Ass.

Make up your own punch-line here because there's just too…many….jokes…to…make…..

(like: and lawyers don't know why people hate them? Or, if Irony is dead, can we please bring it back?)

US Combat Pilots on Speed- Need for Speed Did Amphetamines Play a Role in Afghanistan Friendly Fire Incident? - Yeah, baby, yeah! Gives new meaning to the phrase "Up, Up and Away." If the Air Force needs to recruit more people, I guess they can no go after the lucrative Speed Freak population. How's this for a slogan- "Wanna Take Uppers Legally and Kill People? Join the Air Force!" Who wouldn't be up for that?

US seeks to know more about citizens' travel- Oh wait, there's nothing funny about this.