Did have this long entry about something planned, but…..
Woke up in a really blah mood. One of those can't get out of bed, no way you're making it to the gym, you're gonna be lucky if you even have the motivation to take a shower kind of moods. Not to mention one of those "you know, moving back home isn't such a bad idea" kind of moods.
After finally dragging myself out of bed, getting coffee and the paper, I decided what I needed to do most was to get back in touch with the good-side of being unemployed. The fun, I don't have anything to do and I can do whatever the hell I want to do part. Which yeah, means trying to stay up all night to watch some World Cup (something which wasn't gonna be as easy as I thought it would be, not that staying up watching soccer would be that easy anyways). And it means doing something fun during the day. And what could possibly be more fun to do during the day? Seeing Star Wars again. This time on the Digital Screen. And since I needed some exercise and felt guilty for bailing on the gym, not to mention feeling that the ole buddah belly was getting more buddhaish, I decided I was going to ride my bike to the Metreon. That'll cheer me up.
Ever since my back became aichey, I haven't been riding nearly as much as I used to or should be and I wanted to get back into the biking thang. Get back to where I used to be, when I'd fly everywhere in the city on my wheels. And yeah, riding back and forth to the Metreon isn't really that much of a work out, but it's a start and hopefully, I'd enjoy it so much I'd start getting back into the groove of it all.
So 2:00 rolls around and I grab my bike, drag it down three flights of stairs and bike away, only stopping to go to the gas station because it had been such a long time that I had ridden it that my tires were totally out of air. Locked up my bike safe and secure (something I was SO good at doing because I've already had two bikes stolen), then went off to watch me some Star Wars, Digital style.
Was gonna write about what I thought about it the second time around, about how Lucas is right about digital film and how that much more impressive it looked, and about how the plot really sucks and how much better it could and should have been, but no. Because that's not what the point of this whole thing is.
See, when the movie ended, I strolled outside and headed towards the Metreon garage. The wind was kicking up and blowing right in my face and I thought about how it always seemed in this city that the wind was always blowing in your face. No matter what direction you were travelling, the wind was always in the way, especially when it's late, and the ride home would be a huge slog of a ride. It was looking like one of those slogs of a ride home.
But I didn't have to worry about it. No sirrreee. Didn't have to worry about the wind at all. Why? Because MY BIKE GOT FUCKING STOLEN. AGAIN.
While the previous times my bike was stolen it was partially my fault, or at least badly handled a bad card dealt, this one wasn't my fault. I was so careful, so good. I knew what I had to do. I even stayed awhile longer after locking it to make sure it was good and locked. The lock was fine. No problem there. It was just that the fuckers who stole it just basically CUT RIGHT THROUGH THE LOCK.
Kind of bloody ironic too, what with it being the first times in months I had taken it out and how it was gonna be the day I was gonna get my biking groove on. Too fucking ironic if you ask me.
So now I'm down three bikes in this city. Pitching an ohfer. All of this wouldn't be such a problem, of course, if it wasn't for the fact that I'm also FUCKING UNEMPLOYED. I can barely afford to pay my bills let alone buy another fucking bike. Not to mention had just had a hellacious past week where I lost two jobs bang bang. Or had a fucking miserable year and a half and just when I thought that the clouds were clearing, the sun was about to shine, and I was having things to sing about, the Man put me down again.
Somewhere in hell, right below where the spammers and telemarketers are, but right above the plane filled with suicide bombers and lobbyists, is a special place reserved just for bike thieves. And oh, it's an awful place. With Celine Dion's version of "You Shook Me All Night Long" played on endless 24-hour loop. And with all sorts of nasty beasties and hell-flames flaming away. Like something out of a Boesch painting. That's where bike thieves go. And spend eternity being stretched out on a huge bike wheel while being endlessly whipped by the souls of those whose bikes they have stolen. And…..and….and…
Well I wish I could come up with a funnier thing to say about what happens to bike thieves but I'm too fucking pissed right now.
At least I don't have to worry about the bike continually scuffing up my white walls or taking up too much space in my tiny studio.
Get Me a Bucket
4 years ago