I apologize but there will be no Wank of the Week this week as we are too busy contemplating the meaning of the Red Sox victory tonight. How can anyone else care about anything else? I mean, this is much bigger than a Sign of the Apocalypse, cats and dogs living together type thing. This is a break in the space/time continuum type thing. A tear in the fabric of existence type thing. A reconsider the nature of the universe type thing. What will the rabbis say? The Pope? John Stewart?

It's kind of like everything is possible now.

Speaking of which, the bar I went to watch the game was some divey bar on Valencia Street. I guess weeks ago, the friends of one of the bar regulars decided to set up a bachelor party at the bar for tonight, not realizing, of course, that maybe the biggest baseball game in history was going to be played. So it's the start of the ninth inning, the place is packed with everyone watching the game, and all of a sudden the jukebox goes on, cranking out No Doubt's "Hella Good." And I'm thinking who the hell is actually putting music on a jukebox at the start of the ninth inning of a game 7? Next thing I know, at one side of the bar, the bachelor dude is sitting on a chair and some stripper, who had just walked in looking not like a stripper at all, is giving him a lap dance. In front of not only his friends, but everyone gathered at the bar to watch the game. Now this creates a dilemma, maybe one of the toughest dilemmas your average guy has to face- watch epic sports moment or watch a stripper giving some guy a lap dance? And for those wondering, the answer seems to be, it's watched the stripper. Everyone in the bar, which was about thirty people, watched the lap dance. I'm also thinking that if the guy whose getting married is a Red Sox fan, it could easily be the Greatest Moment of His Life. How many other people can say that they've been tied up on a chair and given a lap dance while watching his beloved baseball team beat the Yankees?

See what I mean about how everything is all crazy now?