Unbelievable. Stunning. Incredible. Jaw-dropping. Speechless rendering.

The Superbowl?

Nope. Britney trying to play a stoner on Saturday night's SNL. Unbelievable.

So what did I think of the Superbowl (for those two or three of you dying to know)? Great game. U2 did themselves proud and didn't embarrass themselves at all. And that the patriotic stuff was as what you'd expect from the Super Bowl- way over the top.

But here's the riff of the game (with help from the people I watched the game with). Kurt Warner is one of the biggest holy-roller Jesus freaks in football. Everytime you ask him something, he's always thanking Jesus for this and for that, quoting this scripture or that scripture, and saying how much he owes the Big Guy for everything. I don't know much about the Pats (who does) but it doesn't strike me that they don't have as many Holy Rollers types on their side. So, then, you would think going into the game that the Rams, besides having one of the greatest offenses in NFL history also have Jesus on their side too. Major advantage to the Rams.

Somehow, though, the Pats neutralized the Jesus factor. You'd figure with Warner being all tight with Jesus that it would help him out. But He didn't. The Pats did so well that they completely fluxommed Warner and won the game. Now how'd the Pats do that?

Did Bellichik's defensive plans take into account the Jesus factor? Did they have Ty Law guard Jesus throughout the game or did they fake Him out with a blitz or two? Did they take advantage of where the game was played and do some sort of voodoo thing before the game by sacrificing a bunch of chickens? Or maybe they counter-balanced Warner's Baptist beliefs with another belief system. Like maybe they had a Catholic Priest or a Rabbi give the pre-game prayer. This way, it would be like a Battle of the God's type thing- kind of like when Moses and the Pharoah's sorcerers engaged in a battle of "whose God is more powerful" back in the Old Testament, with Moses' coming out on top (not sure about whether he covered the spread though). I guess, then, you could say that whoever the Pats had working for them, they were more powerful than Warner's Jesus.

Since nobody cares about the Pro Bowl, I was thinking that they should heighten people's interest by making it a game not between the NFC and the AFC, but between the Born Again's vs. un-Born Again's (the Unbelievers? The On a Highway to Hell's? The Only Born Oncers?). And by those who aren't, I'm not saying guys like Russell Maryland who are obviously not following most of the Lord's commandments, but, say guys aren't all "I owe it all to the Lord" guys. Like Brett Favre. He could be religious, but nobody knows. He could start against Warner. Or maybe you could have Jay Fiedler, the QB of the Dolphins play because he's Jewish. And also have Az-Hakim cause I'm guessing he's not Born Again either.

Think of all the hype that type of game could generate. It's the ultimate battle between Good and Evil, the ultimate battle between the religions. And it would answer the question once and for all who Jesus really helps out during games.