It's Election Time, baby It's fan-tas-tic.

I'm kind of torn this year. I know the responsible thing to do is to go vote, but I really don't care. Really, truly, deeply don't care. I also know that it's a big year in politics. It's also my civic duty, and there are a few things that I really want to vote for (go Medical Marijuana!), but I still don't care. I think I've hit that moment of total "feh" when it comes to politics right now.

The thing is too, that In some ways, voting actually only encourages them. Why should you go out and try and throw an intelligent campaign that everyone hates if you win? In a way, the whole thing is like what happened with that stupid Fox show "Girls Club," the one that was way too overly hyped during the Series. It's the show by David Kelley (the genius behind Ally McBeal!) and it's an exciting story about three hot women lawyers learning how to deal with life on their own. This means we should care. Fox kept on telling us that we should care because it's gotta be good. After all, David Kelley + Lawyers + Claire from Beverly Hills 90210 = Must See TV. Except we all knew it was crap just by looking at it. We knew it was stupid and lame and dumb so we just didn't watch. Fox got the hint that we don't care and cancelled it. Which is kind of what politics is like right now, except for the fact that politicians don't get cancelled.

So I'm gonna vote and pull out the Voter's Guide. But it's two-hundred and fifty pages. And that's just for the City of San Francisco. I have no idea where the California voter's guide is wherever it is, but wherever it is, I'm scared.

Let's put it all in perspective. "The Stranger," Albert Camus discourse on existentialism and the meaning of life clocks in a little under 200 pages. "The Metamorphisis," Kafka's absurdist take on the nature of Modern Man is only about 40 pages. Conrad's "the Heart Of Darkness," which is a great exploration on modern society and the thing that gave us "Apocolypse Now" is only about 120-140 pages. All of those books are classics. All of these books teach us about mankind, life, and our relationship to both. The Voter's Guide is 250 pages and teaches us bupkus.

And the reason for all of this is because the system is just plain ole fucked up. It's either big huge industries trying to pull a fast one over people (if you want a laugh, check out the names of the PAC's that paid for proposition commercials at the end of the ad, stuff like "Citizens for a Fair Tax" or "Oil Companies for the Environment") or it's because the politicians are too chicken shit to actually take a stand. And sometimes it's because the politicians are trying to pull a fast one over people. According to the Chron "six of the 20 measures were submitted on the last qualifying day. There were no prior hearings, no time for study and no analysis. The mayor can submit what he likes. Four supervisors, not a majority of the 11- member board, have the same freedom." Thus we have crap like Proposition N, the "oh no, we have to do something cause Gavin Newsome is actually popular" Proposition.

But what to do, what to do. How do we register disappointment without actually egging on the people responsible?

So here's my idea. We need to add an extra choice on the ballot and we should call it the "Bite Me" option. As in, "why are you making me vote on this crap? Bite Me." This should definitely send the proper message to those in charge that we're not gonna take it. We're not gonna take it. No, we ain't gonna take it
We're not gonna take it anymore (uh, sorry).

Take, for example, this proposition. Proposition F. It's basically a vote on how many members of the New Entertainment Commission will have and who appoints them. A Yes vote means that the Mayor gets to choose four and the Board of Supervisor's gets to appoint three of them. If you vote No, it means the Mayor gets to choose all 7 of them. Who fucking cares? Why am I voting on this? Why should I care? Isn't this what our city government, the one's who are paid for doing dealing for stuff like this should figure out? This is a total "Bite Me" vote.

Then, there's Proposition K, which is a vote on how the city chooses it's Official Newspaper to announce things on. Again, like I give a fuck. I'm having major new job issues, I'm still not getting any decent sleep and it's affecting my health, and my Fantasy Football team is playing the best team in the league next week and half my team has a bye week. This proposition? Bite me.

You can even take it further, move it to other realms and for other reasons. For instance, we actually have to vote for "Candidates for Community College Board." What-ever. Or even members of the Board of Education. Look, I'm sure there's a difference between some of them and I'm sure some of them are better than others, but just as long as they don't go around voting to put Creationism in the schools, I don't care. Again, aren't there people who get paid to do stuff like this able to do stuff like this? Bite me.

Here's another one- Prop 49. Prop 49 is for funding Before and After school programs. It's actually not a bad idea, other than it comes out of all the other money that's supposed to go to schools. It is, however, mainly supported by Arnie Schwarzanager whose behind it mainly to help launch his run for Governor in 2006. God help us all. Bite me, Arnie.

See? Wouldn't that be better? Wouldn't it be great if they roll through the election results and then announce that the winner isn't a candidate, but Bite Me? Wouldn't that send a message to those in politics?

What else can we do? After all

We've got the right to choose and
There ain't no way we'll lose it
This is our life, this is our song
We'll fight the powers that be just
Don't pick our destiny 'cause
You don't know us, you don't belong

We're not gonna take it
No, we ain't gonna take it
We're not gonna take it anymore

Oh you're so condescending
Your gall is never ending
We don't want nothin', not a thing from you
Your life is trite and jaded
Boring and confiscated
If that's your best, your best won't do