Written a few days ago, before the weather turned icy cold….

I was walking down Valencia today (and there's nothing so attractive like Mission women walking down the street in their low-cut outfits, showing off their entire tatoo-filled bodies) and I saw a new campaign poster for one of the Mayoral Candidates. The Candidate- the Poet Prince of San Francisco Politics, the Lizard King of the Board has a sign very tastefully done, almost artsy in a 60's pop-art way, with the slogan: "Our Ideas are Better." Wow, I thought, way to get right to the point. No silly little slogans like "Bringing People Together" or "Making San Francisco Better" or "For Rainbows and Puppy Dogs"- just straight out, flat-out, I'm so much better than you and everyone who agrees with me is so straight out, flat-out smarter than you. And while that view, deep-down, is the underlying philosophy behind all politics, I've never seen it relayed so out in the open.

Okay, now bear with me, I swear that isn't going to get too political or to inside SF politics- there's a point to all of this…..

In a nutshell, that banner pretty much sums up everything I don't like about the candidate (in fact, it sums up a lot of things that I don't like about people in SF, but that's another story. Actually it's kind of one in the same, so play along with the metaphor if you will). If you read about his campaign, you'll read that it that the candidate's main style of campaigning is doing things like holding art openings or doing pub crawls or having (pedal) bike rallies. Hell, his campaign headquarters is an uber hip coffee house in Lower Haight known for having high-speed internet connections and the playing of art flicks on the back wall. The guy is definitely one hep cat.

Naturally, of course, this makes him the fave candidate of the hipster/progressive types. "He's one of us," they keep on saying when asked about him and it's true, he is one of them. This seems to be his campaign's main message- I'm so cool and my friends are so cool, so vote for us and be cool too. It's not even a referendum on his politics really, it's more like a referendum on just how cool he is. Like he's running more for Class President than Mayor. If you read about his campaign, though, you'll notice that there doesn't appear to be any outreach to any other neighborhoods, no discussion of things that people who aren't a hipster would want to hear, nothing that, say, somebody in Hunter's Point would care about.

Then there's his main opponent, the Evil Prince of SF Politics, Evil for having the audacity to be born straight, rich, and white. Not to mention good looking and married to his hot ex-lingerie model wife. If he ran in any other city, he'd be considered a liberal to moderate Democrat, but here in SF-land, being a Moderate Democrat, especially one who actually tries to do something about the Homeless without bringing on the end of capitalism, is a bad thing.

When I saw him at the debate I went to, my main impression I had of him was that he was trying way to hard to look like a politician. He had all the pat slogans, all the hand-mannerisms, and all the dodgy pat responses that politicians have. It was like he had just graduated from Politician Finishing School and still hadn't mastered it yet. He was a Politician-In-Training. He also has a huge campaign chest full of money from all those people who people like me don't like to see handing out money- big business and rich folks. Nobody likes "politicians," nobody likes people who act like politicians, and nobody likes people who take money from rich people and businesses. In his way, the Evil Price embodies all of what we all complain about.

If, however, you do any sort of digging around and read about him and his campaign, you'd also see that he's also been doing a lot of other things. He's studied all the issues, even the small minor one's, and has written policy papers on it; he's kind of wonky in his way. He's also gone to every section of the city, met with every type of group, and answered questions about every possible thing. You'll also discover that he's gone to other cities to see what works there and what doesn't work. Unlike the other candidate, the Evil Prince is running your basic, standard Mayoral campaign. The kind of campaign that every typical politician runs. And you know what, sometimes that's not a bad thing.

Look, politics in some ways is about going through hoops. Everyone who runs has to do things a certain way. Some of them are pretty stupid and pretty silly, some of them aren't. The rules for running for Mayor are especially set in stone. If you're running for Mayor, you should be going out to every neighborhood. You should know every policy detail. You should attend every possible meeting. These things matter. As silly as some of those hoops are, they at least give you an idea of who really wants to be Mayor, who really wants to help everyone, and who really knows what the hell is going.

Okay, here's the point to all of this- when it comes down to it, I'd rather vote for the guy who is trying really hard to run for Mayor as opposed to one who is too cool for School to run for Mayor. Those hoops do matter.

Also, if your campaign slogan is "Our Ideas are Better" you're a pompous jackass.