And now let's consider the case of Jackie Chan. Dude makes tons of movies in Hong Kong and becomes one of the biggest action stars in the world. Except of course in America because we here don't like movies starring foreigners who speak funny. His fight scenes are almost ballet-like and jaw-droppingly amazing, especially when considering he did them all himself. Some of his flicks, like Drunken Master II and Police Story II are considered masterpieces. In fact, he is often compared to Buster Keaton for his movie's visual craft and precision like beauty of the stunts.

Completely rich and well-known pretty much everywhere but in the U.S., he comes to Hollywood to make his fame in America. They give him a buddy flick with Chris Tucker that's mildly funny and another one with Owen Wilson that was also mildly funny (and should have been much funnier considering it had Owen Wilson in it). All were mildly successful enough to spawn sequels, but none ever came close to the artistry of his earlier work. Probably because Hollywood sucks.

Still, Chan's fans (of which I include myself, although I'm not fanatical about it or have seen every one of his movies but have sat through an entire movie that was neither subtitled or dubbed because the rental box was wrong) hold out hope that with all of his talent and all of the talent and money in Hollywood, he would still be able to churn out another classic. Show them how to do it, as it were.

And now this, his new movie, The Tuxedo, costarring (and I am not making this up) Jennifer Love Hewitt. Jennifer Love Hewitt.

Somewhere, somebody thought this was a good idea. Somewhere, somebody put up money for this idea. Somewhere, somebody thinks this is gonna be a good movie.

I can't get a job yet somebody in Hollywood making buckets of money thought this piece of shit up. People are starving in Africa and someone put up the money to make this piece of shit.

Oh Jackie....